FLF 03

03 — Confession

This chapter shifts perspective.

By the time I realized I was wrong, it was already too late…

It was my own body that taught me what it meant to be “too late.”

There was no way back.

“Mm… ahh… nngh…”

“Mana… you’ve gotten good at this, haven’t you?”

Aika-chan smiled softly.

I turned my face away, suddenly embarrassed.

“Don’t. Look at me.”

Her hand gently guided my face back.

I was too flustered to respond to what she said, so instead I leaned in and kissed her again on my own.

Our lips met naturally, tongues tangling together, and my thoughts grew hazy.

My chest tightened, heat spreading through me as the kiss deepened… and deepened… until I was no longer thinking at all—only wanting more.

Around this time, what we called being “close friends” had already crossed a line.

It had started as something simple—just a conversation about making my chest grow bigger.

But it had slowly escalated, until now we were doing things that looked more like what lovers would do.

Even I could tell it had gone too far.

Once you’re in middle school, you start to understand when something is abnormal.
Of course, even back in elementary school I had thought it was strange—but back then, I hadn’t been able to stop it either.

Today, I had decided. I would finally tell Aika-chan. I would stop this.

But on that very day, she was unusually kind to me.

More gentle than usual.

Almost as if she were deliberately luring me into pleasure, making it impossible to resist.

In the end, I still couldn’t say anything.

That night too, I said nothing.

With my mind turned completely white, I could only feel myself sinking—quietly, helplessly—into something like an abyss.

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“Kasihara!”

When I turned around at the voice calling my name, Emi Orikawa was standing there.

We were in the same class, and recently I had become fairly close with her—almost as close as I was with Mami.

…Almost.

She wasn’t the type to stick with groups. She seemed to prefer being alone most of the time.

The reason we got close was something trivial.

She had forgotten her assignment worksheet and ended up getting severely scolded by the English teacher. After school that day, she was forced to stay behind and complete three times the usual amount of worksheets as punishment.

I was waiting for my own club duty to finish—I had promised to go home with Aika-chan afterward.

I had been stuck in the library for a while, but unlike Aika-chan, I wasn’t really the type who read books. I could manage picture books or short stories, but thick novels like the ones she always read would make me sleepy after just a few pages.

Thinking it would still take a while before my duty ended, I wandered back to my classroom on impulse.

That was when I saw Orikawa alone at her desk, quietly working through her punishment worksheets.

She always gave off a slightly unapproachable aura, so I hesitated at the door, unsure whether to go in.

But before I could decide, she noticed me first.

She blinked, then smiled gently.

“Kasihara, club activity?”

“No… my sister’s in another class…”

“Oh, right. You’re twins, aren’t you?”

“Yeah. She’s in the library committee, so I was waiting for her to finish.”

“You’re going somewhere after that?”

“No. We promised to go home together.”

Orikawa looked down at her paper and chuckled softly.

I tilted my head, unsure what was funny.

She quickly waved a hand.

“Sorry, sorry. I just thought… you live in the same house, right? You don’t have to wait for each other.”

“Mm… but we made a promise.”

“You’re really serious about that, huh. Or maybe I should say you two get along really well.”

Her laughter was light and rare compared to her usual quiet demeanor, so I found myself staring.

When she noticed, she tilted her head back at me.

“Oh—sorry. It’s just… I think this is the first time I’ve seen you laugh like that.”

To be honest, I had always thought she was a bit scary.

Hard to approach.

So seeing her like this made me strangely happy.

“I’m kind of shy,” she muttered, scratching her head a little awkwardly.

It was unexpectedly cute, and I ended up laughing too.

That was how we became friends.

Recently, I even stayed over at her house.

It was my first sleepover, and I was so excited that I ended up bombarding her with questions even after she tried to sleep.

Somehow, the conversation turned to first love.

I thought about Aika-chan.

And before I knew it, I had gone silent in the middle of my own story.

Maybe she noticed.

Because suddenly, Orikawa told me—almost reluctantly—that she had someone she liked.

She said, “I’m only telling you this.”

Because of her boyish appearance, she had apparently always been popular with girls. So I wasn’t particularly shocked.

She had hidden her feelings from everyone else, but told me she wanted to tell me.

After that, I started liking her even more.

Even after going home, I kept talking about her. She became someone I compared everything to.

More than Mami, we shared similar interests.

At first she felt distant—but now she was important to me.

“Orikawa-san, what’s wrong?”

The reason I still called her “-san” was simple.

She said being called by her first name felt ticklish.

She had even told me she’d rather be called “Orikawa” than “Emi,” but that still felt a bit too direct, so we ended up sticking with “-san.”

“Ah… sorry. I should’ve said this in class, but I wasn’t sure if it was something I should keep secret…”

I tilted my head, and she glanced around before lowering her voice.

“About external entrance exams… is it true?”

“I heard the teachers talking earlier. Your sister’s doing it too, right?”

“…Ah, that.”

I nodded.

“I wasn’t trying to hide it. I just wanted to say it properly once everything was decided.”

“I’m sorry. Aika-chan only just decided recently, but I was actually approached by a teacher this term… I’ve been thinking about it for a while.”

“…I see. So where are you applying?”

As we walked, we kept talking.

She supported my decision, telling me that if I had something I wanted to do, I should try.

When I finally admitted I was a little scared, she gently smiled and patted my shoulder.

“You’ll be fine.”

After that, we talked a bit about university, about next year.

“It’s going to feel lonely,” she laughed.

“Yeah…”

“I have things to do at the staff room, so I’ll go ahead.”

“Ah—sorry for keeping you.”

“It’s okay. Thank you. See you later.”

Just as she turned toward the staff room, Orikawa suddenly called my name again.

I turned back.

She looked slightly flustered.

“…No, it’s nothing. Sorry.”

I laughed a little.

She really was cute when she panicked.

We parted ways.

“So then Orikawa-san suddenly stopped me for no reason, and she was all flustered. She’s usually so cool, so it was kind of cute.”

“Hmm.”

I always walked home with Aika-chan.

At first it was just because we were going the same way, but now it had become a habit.

Still… sometimes I wished I could go to a café or fast food place with friends after school.

But Aika-chan always came to pick me up.

And if I said I was going out with someone else, she’d look lonely.

She wasn’t good with people. Being with anyone other than me seemed painful for her.

So I couldn’t just leave her alone.

“I think Orikawa-san might get along with you, Aika-chan. She’s kind of like you. Want to meet her sometime? She doesn’t like groups either.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Ehh—if you did, you might actually make a friend…”

“She’s good at singing too!”

“…I don’t care.”

Her mood was off today.

Lately, ever since the university talk, she had been more irritable.

And I… had been avoiding her a little too.

We still talked, but something had changed.

Even though we still slept in the same bed before, I had started sleeping separately again.

Maybe that was why she was upset.

“…You’ve been getting close with Orikawa lately, haven’t you?”

“Huh? Yeah… we just get along.”

“Is that so… good for you.”

I knew what people called Aika-chan behind her back.

She never seemed to care.

Once, they even called me that by mistake.

Mannequin.
Doll.
Dark… never talks… like a ghost.
Like some kind of wandering spirit.

Hearing those words about her made my chest ache.

When I heard her respond normally once after that, I cried without meaning to.

Was she really okay?

Or was she just pretending?

She never showed it.

And when I accidentally bumped into someone in the hallway—

“Whoa! A doll hit me. Don’t walk around, doll.”

I apologized immediately.

But then they leaned in and whispered.

And suddenly laughed.

“Wait, that was your sister? Sorry, sorry~ But she’s cute, right? Even with the same face, they’re so different… I wonder why you’re twins.”

Something inside me snapped.

I slapped her.

“—It hurts!! What’s wrong with you?!”

“Take it back!”

“Huh?”

“Take it back right now!”

I didn’t care.

Because in my mind, we were supposed to be the same.

Different strengths, different weaknesses—but we completed each other.

That was what I believed.

So hearing it denied felt unbearable.

Mami stopped us before it escalated further.

But if she hadn’t, I might have hit her again.

After that day, I tried harder to make Aika-chan friends.

It never worked.

And I started to think it probably never would.

“Mana?”

“Ah—sorry. What were you saying?”

“You actually made another friend besides Aizawa-san, right? That’s good.”

“Yeah…”

Mami laughed softly.

“Lonely thing to say.”

“Because… you’re my sister. You’re not a friend.”

“I guess that’s true.”

We walked on.

Then she said casually—

“…I’m a little jealous.”

“Eh?”

She took my hand and held it gently.

“Because you look like you’re having more fun with her.”

“I don’t think it’s different from when I’m with Mami.”

“Still… it bothers me.”

I laughed.

“It’s fine. I’m not leaving you just because I have more friends.”

But the moment I said it, her expression changed.

And I immediately regretted it.

“Don’t say things like that.”

Her voice was suddenly cold.

“Who knows when we might drift apart.”

“Maybe if you get more friends, you’ll realize you don’t need someone gloomy like me anymore.”

“…So I’ll stop coming close to you.”

“Bye.”

She walked ahead.

No joke in her voice.

No smile.

“Wait—Aika-chan, I was just—!”

But she didn’t turn around.

My chest tightened.

It felt like I couldn’t breathe.

No… don’t go.

Without thinking, I ran and hugged her from behind.

“Wah!? Mana?”

“Don’t… don’t say things like that…”

Tears spilled out before I could stop them.

“I was joking,” she said quickly.

“I’d never say that to you. I just wanted to tease you. Sorry, don’t cry.”

“But… you’ve never said something like that before…”

“I’m sorry, okay?”

“Orikawa-san is just your friend, right? It’s fine. I won’t get mad. I won’t cut ties or anything.”

“…I—”

“Hmm?”

The thought of her disappearing made my chest hurt unbearably.

We had always been together.

Always.

She was the closest person to me.

And I was the closest to her.

I didn’t want that to change.

Even the university decision—deep down, I had been relieved she was coming with me.

Maybe I was the one who couldn’t survive without her.

And before I knew it, the words slipped out.

Something I had never said so lightly before.

“…I like you.”

“Aika-chan…”

“I love you… don’t go anywhere.”

“…Mana. Want to sleep together tonight?”

“—!”

If I answered that, something would change.

Something irreversible.

But I nodded anyway.

She hugged me gently.

“Mana… I love you too.”

“Yeah… I love you.”

At that time, I had no idea.

That this moment—this single confession—

Would be the beginning of everything falling apart.