Chapter 1
. The World Turns Pure White
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âIâm sorryââ
I got rejected.
My childhood friend, the one who had always been by my side throughout my entire life.
It happened behind the school building after our high school graduation ceremony. From spring onward, weâd be going to different universities. I thought maybe weâd start drifting apart, and thatâs why I decidedâtoday, I had to confess my feelings.
Tears welled up quickly in Rikaâs eyes.
I must have shocked her. To realize Iâd been seeing her in that way. When it was just the two of us, sheâd always been so unguarded, so open.
Even if she turned me down, I honestly thought sheâd laugh it off.
But in those tear-filled, wide eyes, I didnât see reproach. Only the color of compassion, like she was worried about my feelings. She was thinking sheâd hurt me.
Why is it that I can understand something like that? When the truth is, I never really understood Rika at all.
âYugoâŠâ
She said my name, but no other words followed. Her eyes still glistened with tears.
Ahhh. I want to crawl into a hole. What the hell was I getting all worked up about by myself? Even if I tried to play it off, Rika could clearly tell I was being serious.
Otherwise, why would she be staring so straight at me without blinking, without looking away, even as her eyes filled with tears?
So this is what they mean when they say âyour mind goes blank.â
My breathing grew shallow, my field of vision narrowed. Like sunlight scattering in every direction, the world around me was shrinking into a blinding white.
And still, I couldnât tear my eyes away from Rikaâs.
I knew I had to say something. But what? I was the one who hurt her, wasnât I? And yet, she was the one worrying about me.
The whiteness crept further and further into my vision.
So this is how weak I really am. Even in self-mockery, the person who came to mind was still Rika. Her large, beautiful eyes blurred, then disappeared altogether. My sight went pure white, my mind empty.
Weâd lived next door since we were born, done everything together.
Even this morning, weâd walked to school side by side. Kindergarten, elementary, middle school, high school⊠Today weâd laughed about how it was our last time going together.
Iâd decided thenâI would confess after graduation.
âI want you to listen without laughing,â
Iâd said, trying to sound cool. That was my mistake.
Unable to bear it anymore, I covered my face with both hands. What expression was I supposed to wear? What face could I possibly show her?
âWait, what?
In the middle of that blinding white, I could see my own palms.
When I lowered my hands, everything before me was still pure light, yet I could see my own bodyâmy hands, arms, legs, torso.
What the hell? Do people get so shocked that they can only see themselves?
âRika!â
I shouted, calling out for the girl who should have been standing before me. But no reply came. I couldnât even see the ground. Was I⊠floating? Flying? What was this feeling?
Was I about to pass out?
God, Iâm pathetic.
Rika had seen me at my most disgraceful yet again. Weâd never been the type to keep secrets from each other, but to show her this, right before we parted ways for goodâthis had to be the worst.
Ahhh. At this point, whatever.
Just as the strength drained from my body, a color broke into my white visionâthe vivid hue of blue.
Long, blue hair.
âWhat the hell? A gal?
A girl with hair so long it fell past her waist, lying there in lingerie that matched her dazzling blue hair. Clothes strewn across the floor, along with some scroll-like things scattered around the room.
âA room? Wait⊠where am I?
My panicked eyes accidentally fell on the deep cleavage of the blue-haired girl. I jerked my gaze away. Even Rika, unguarded as she always was, had never shown herself in just underwear.
The walls were stone, the ceiling wooden. The beams painted a deep vermilion, patterned with golden lines. Plush red cords dangled downâŠ
Where was I? Had the shock of being rejected made me lose my memory? Was I sleepwalking? A daydream? Was this really happening? Does heartbreak do this to you?
Suddenly, Rikaâs voice replayed in my ears: âIâm sorryââ
I shut my eyes tight, tilting my head back. I got dumped. I really got dumped.
Her words repeated over and over inside my head. âIâm sorryâ.â I wanted to drown them out, to replace them with any other sound. Outside the room was noisy. Rain pattered down. Between those sounds, I heard soft breathingâthe blue-haired girlâs, probably.
But still, Rikaâs âIâm sorryââ filled my head, refusing to leave. I kept seeing her tearful eyes staring into mine.
Unable to endure it, I opened my eyes againâonly for the lingerie-clad blue-haired girl to fill my vision.
If I stared too much, I had no idea what kind of accusations I might face. But if I didnât focus on something, Rikaâs image would just swell larger in my head. So I stared vaguely at the girl, unfocused.
Her figure was stunningâlike something off the cover of a manga magazine, maybe even more. No matter how much I tried to blur my focus, this was still my first time seeing a girl in her underwear in real life. My cheeks burned, though my heart remained heavy.
Every time I thought âSheâs got a chest as big as Rikaâsââ the image of tearful Rika appeared again.
Actually, her face looked like Rikaâs too. Practically identical. Or was I just so hung up that everyone looked like her now? In the dim light, I tried to take a closer look at the blue-haired girlâs face.
âDim light?
A few lanterns glowed faintly in the room. Startled, I looked for a window. In the stone wall, I spotted a small opening. Outside was pitch dark. And pouring rain.
Night? But it had been just before noon when the graduation ceremony ended! How much time had I lost?
Even as Rikaâs image and voice continued to replay vividly in my mind, the bizarre situation before me began to settle my panic.
Just then, the vermilion-painted door burst open with a loud slam.
A woman with long black hair rushed into the room.
Wait, whatâ?
A girl in her underwear. Clothes scattered everywhere. A dimly lit room in disarray. Wasnât this exactly the kind of situation that looked bad? I had no memory of how I got here, but anyone walking in would doubt me.
If Rika saw this, it would only make her cry moreâ
The black-haired woman who had slammed the door shut turned toward me.
Her eyes blazed with a fiery crimson light.






