[CHAPTER 105]
“Just now, what did I…?”
“Princess.”
Startled by her own words, Lincia covered her mouth with one hand.
There are limits to recklessness. Tereo was the man who had confessed his love to her, after all.
“I love you.”
“I kept you from leaving the palace because I loved you. Because I loved you.”
But Tereo seemed unconcerned by Lincia’s slip of the tongue, shrugging lightly.
“I didn’t hear anything.”
Then he continued calmly,
“Isn’t it a little warm here?”
Lincia remained silent. She felt grateful that he had skillfully diverted the conversation.
It reminded her of her recent conversation with Harvich, in the cold northern air.
“I will prove it.”
Prove what? Lincia had lost the moment to ask.
“I will prove it.”
But Harvich’s voice was so firm that Lincia almost convinced herself he truly could prove it to her.
“No matter how hard you try, you cannot prove anything to me.”
Lincia herself had tried to prove something to Harvich over a long time, but had been repeatedly frustrated before the man she did not trust.
She could not be sure she could act differently than Harvich.
“You did the same, didn’t you?”
She didn’t want to immediately believe him when he said he would prove it. If anything, she thought of making him…
Reaching that thought, Lincia bit her lip.
“Give me time.”
“Why?”
“At the very least, you should trample on my efforts as much as the time you suffered alone, shouldn’t you?”
Harvich’s calm words made Lincia feel her inner thoughts had been exposed.
“T-Trample?”
“Exactly as I said.”
Unconsciously, she clenched her hands.
“Take your revenge.”
“……”
Lincia had thought such things herself. The reason she loudly said she did not love him was just that—she wanted to hurt him.
“You don’t have to trust me, and you may strike me. You may criticize me without reason.”
He voiced the things Lincia had wanted to say to him at least once.
“Even if you lie, I will believe you.”
The desire to expose her flaws and, in doing so, hurt him existed together in her heart.
“Even if it causes harm, I will not resent you.”
“……”
“If, after all your time, you wish to leave me, then do so.”
Truly, absurdly,
“I will not hold you back.”
Lincia read Harvich’s love not in his confession but in these words. She turned her head away from the man’s persistently gazing eyes.
Her heartbeat sounded. Lincia intuitively realized that the sound was hers alone.
Her face flushed deeply. She quickly left the bedroom.
She needed to calm her emotions.
The thumping on the wooden floor sounded like a drum.
Heat rose to her head, and her eyes became red.
To think she wanted to trouble and hurt Harvich… Such ugly feelings could not possibly be love. Lincia pressed on her chest. Her heart still beat as if to prove she was not mistaken.
She did not want to see the end of her long unrequited love, that pure, innocent affection, become such a thing. So she wanted to run from the feelings Harvich stirred within her.
***
“I do not want to live like that.”
Her head knew it was right to let go. But there were too many things she had failed to do, too many wrongs committed, so she could not let Lincia go.
Harvich clung stubbornly, pitifully. He would even sell his soul to a devil to gain just a little time with Lincia.
Did it result from begging the person who did not want to talk to him?
Eventually, Lincia ran away. Yet Harvich could not catch her. If he went too close, she might escape to a place he could never reach.
All he could do was wait for her to return all day. She had nowhere to go, so she would come back. That fact was both maddeningly relieving and disgusting to him.
The maid entered the room to care for the child and immediately bowed to Harvich.
The warmth and scent of heated milk filled the room.
“The nanny?”
“She will arrive at the mansion next week.”
Harvich looked at the child who resembled him, then held her. The maid taught him how to hold her properly. Despite her stiff body, the child smiled brightly.
Her patience seemed inherited from Lincia, which made his chest ache.
“She does not cry easily.”
The child was tiny but warm. The heat alone intimidated him.
“She doesn’t have a fever, right?”
“The child’s temperature is higher than an adult’s.”
“Does Lincia come often?”
Perhaps because of anxiety.
Harvich realized he spoke more than usual. Seeing the maid not respond, he bit the inside of his cheek.
The child resembled her father, who did not trust him. Many reasons existed for her not to come.
“She tries to come once a day.”
Harvich turned at Lincia’s voice.
“Nine months.”
Lincia stood there.
“I’ll give you nine months.”
Her face showed firmness. Nine months later, she would leave him without fail, determined not to love him. But Harvich did not care for now.
“I will do well.”
It was fortunate that Lincia promised not to leave immediately. The feeling was like being pulled from the depths of hell. Harvich carefully laid the child in her cradle.
“I want to leave a record of what you said in writing.”
“I will prepare it.”
“We don’t have to return to the Grand Duke’s castle, right?”
“No.”
“Bring the documents.”
“I will.”
Harvich immediately began drafting the documents.
***
Hyu was now returning to the north, which had become a duchy.
His rough expression was full of anger.
“I’ve finished preparing the documents. I included not only poisons but also many items used by the royal family. You know these are state secrets, right?”
So he lied to Yulias when pressed to keep his promise. Since there was no guarantee the royal family would abandon the Grand Duchess’ child, he thought it better to preemptively know about any plots regarding poisons.
“They say the child resembles the Duke.”
Though Harvich’s child had not been described in detail, if he was confident it was his, the resemblance must be there.
“Too bad. Any thought of a birthday celebration?”
“I’m not sure about that.”
Hyu had expected that if the information he wanted did not appear, the documents might not be handed over.
Yulias handed the documents over willingly.
Returning directly to the guest room, Hyu immediately opened the papers and began reading.
The bundle, about ten pages, mostly listed poisons that had gone missing once around 20 years ago.
How had they been managed with such dangerous substances?
Hyu selected several poisons that the late emperor likely used on his servants, along with those related to memory.
[Actopin – Used to erase specific memories. Commonly used in trauma therapy, but ingesting large doses at once can be fatal. Note: Some missing 20 years ago]
[Renatopin – Poison that renders a person mentally incapacitated. Large amounts instantly erase memories. Stopping use allows lost memories to be recovered.]
Then Hyu discovered something familiar:
[Renatorin – Nutrient for fetuses; overdose causes extreme pain to the mother. Originally a supplement, but the royal family used it as a poison to kill concubine children. Note: Some missing 20 years ago]
“This won’t immediately threaten life. The child’s life is also…”
“Damn. What kind of poisons are these?”
“These were used often in love-affair incidents. The main wife used them to trouble the concubine.”
“Poisons?”
Hyu chewed his inner cheek, recalling his conversation with Ethan.
