TMLOH 22

Chapter : 22 

“What? What did you just say?”

Jade reacted a beat too late. Pession shook his head.

“Mm. Nothing.”

“Your Highness, are you feeling unwell?”

“No, I’m healthy!”

“Phew, you scared me.”

Jade clutched his chest in relief. He had almost become a heartless villain for training the Crown Prince without realizing he might be sick.

Moved by Jade’s dramatic reaction, Pession spoke again.

“It’s just that… well… I have a friend who’s a little weak. Because they’re not very healthy, we can’t play for long. But I want to play together for a long, long time.”

Pession shyly scratched the floor with his foot.

“If they get healthy, we can play more, right?”

“I see.”

Jade looked at the Crown Prince’s slightly flushed cheeks.

A face still round and plump with baby fat, yet undeniably reminiscent of the former Emperor Edward and Empress Azenny.

Who could possibly be the blessed one receiving such attention and affection from a boy like this?

“Health, huh…”

Even the Crown Prince has such a thoughtful heart. How noble of him to care so much about a friend’s well-being.

Jade was so touched, he put all his effort into passing on everything he knew.

“The human body actually works based on surprisingly simple principles.”

“Simple… like what?”

“A regular routine, sufficient sleep, three balanced meals a day, and moderate exercise. That’s the core of it.”

“I see.”

“Was that helpful?”

“Yeah!”

Pession smiled.

A smile so bright it could light up a dark world.

“The most important of all is exercise. The human body is designed to feel more alive when it’s active.”

“That makes sense!”

“More strength! A healthier body! That’s why we need training.”

Jade, who found himself smiling without realizing it, picked up his sword again.

“Well then, shall we resume training?”

“Okay!”

I need to finish this fast and go tell Arellin how to get healthy!

Pession energetically wrapped up the training.

The next day, at the scheduled childhood friends’ gathering—

“What? Arellin isn’t coming?!”

Dun dun.

Just like that, clouds gathered over Pession’s perfect plan.

Not going outside is great.

Mehen kept his promise to me. He sent a formal notice to the palace saying I wouldn’t be attending for a while due to health reasons.

“Mehen is the best.”

What am I doing, you ask?

I’ve evolved into one with my bed, buried deep under a light and fluffy blanket.

In Korea, there’s a wise saying:

“The outside of the bed is dangerous!”

“So I’ll stay in bed all day because outside is dangerous.”

Everything was perfect.

Except for one thing.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Huh? You’re telling me to go out? That you’ll rest?”

“Can’t we just stay here and keep watch? We won’t do anything. We won’t even breathe loudly!”

“Boohoo, my lady is so mean…”

The butler and the maids were too clingy.

“My ladyyyyy—!”

“Lady Arellinnnnn—!”

Eventually, I was reduced to hiding from my own staff to get some peace.

“Sigh.”

After being tormented by a new royal palace leech, now even my own house won’t leave me alone.

“I’m the one my lady favors most after Mehen.”

“Ha! What are you talking about? I’m the one responsible for her health, so I’m the most qualified!”

“Oh yeah? That’s why you couldn’t even give her medicine on time?”

“You—!”

Why are they fighting?

The usually elegant and professional butler and maids suddenly dropped all pretenses and turned the house into a battlefield.

“Why aren’t you joining in?”

The one quietly standing by my side as always was Ern, the butler who always escorted me on outings.

I heard he used to be some incredible knight somewhere, but why he’s working as a butler, I have no clue.

“Aah, the lady is showing interest in me…!”

Ern was moved to tears.

Oh. Right. This guy was part of the “childcare corps” too.

“Don’t worry, I won’t disgrace myself like them.”

“…”

“Haha. That look—do you doubt me? How painful. I am content simply serving and protecting you like a shadow.”

I kept sending him suspicious glances, but Ern deflected them all with ease.

Now that I think about it, he hasn’t really been bothering me…

“The others are reflecting deeply on their past actions. They’ve pledged a blood oath to never leave you alone again and to serve you more perfectly.”

Blood oath? That sounds terrifying even the second time.

“We won’t let anything like that happen to you ever again.”

“…Well, do what you want.”

Was that whole incident with the maids talking trash really that shocking?

I get insulted all the time. It’s kind of routine for me. Wasn’t it just… normal? I think everyone’s overreacting.

“Don’t worry, my lady. We’ll devote our entire lives to serving you with heart and soul!”

Was Ern always this passionate?

I nodded absentmindedly at his burning gaze, then tilted my head in confusion.

“But aren’t all of you in the childcare corps on fixed-term contracts?”

“…Pardon?”

“So how are you going to serve me for life?”

From what I know, the contract ends when I die—or become an adult.

I only asked out of curiosity, but Ern’s eyes widened.

As if asking, how do you know that…?

“You’re going to abandon us?!”

Wait, how did we get there?

“After we dedicated our hearts and souls to you, you plan to cast us aside?!”

“…?”

When did you dedicate anything? I don’t remember receiving it.

“Gasp! My lady, how cruel!”

“Wait, no, hang on—”

Before I could stop him, Ern stormed off dramatically, hurt beyond belief. I was left bewildered. What just happened?

“There she is!”

“We found the lady!”

“My ladyyyy—!”

Because Ern shouted so loudly, my location was revealed.

As the childcare corps maids swarmed in, I slapped my forehead.

I’m doomed.

A peaceful evening.

After being hounded all day, I had hoped at least this time could be peaceful.

“My lady, I’ll feed you!”

“No, I will!”

“What? It’s my turn this time. Yuni!”

My peace was nowhere to be found. Only unwanted chaos remained.

Ah… my river of peace…

“No! I’m the lady’s number one head maid.”

“Fine. Step outside. We’ll decide who’s #1 today.”

“Yeah! Duel!”

“We fight to the death. Loser becomes the winner’s slave.”

“Deal!”

Lately, strange things had been happening at the Halbern estate. Members of the childcare corps suddenly started fighting among themselves to establish a pecking order.

Why? I had no idea. Why they were suddenly trying to treat me better, or ranking their favoritism—I couldn’t understand any of it.

“Ugh, grown adults arguing about rank. Pathetic, right, my lady?”

“Uh… yeah…”

“Let’s just leave those losers be. I’ll feed you. Say ‘ah~’”

“…I can eat by myself.”

“Sniff. It was my lifelong dream to feed you. I even practiced in secret yesterday…”

How do you practice feeding someone?

“…Ah.”

“Now, say ah~!”

As I reluctantly chewed the pudding Rana gave me, Yuni, the victor of the duel, yelled out.

“Hey! I wanted to feed her! That’s cheating!”

“What are you talking about? I simply noticed the lady was neglected and took care of her.”

“Neglected?! We would never neglect the lady!”

“I don’t know about that. All I know is, I was there for her. Right, my lady?”

“…”

I don’t know. Please figure it out yourselves.

“My lady, don’t you think Rana’s in the wrong here?”

“My lady, Yuni is being totally unreasonable, isn’t she?”

I was suddenly caught in the middle and felt exhausted.

Help me, Solomon!

“Split it in half.”

“…!”

When I recited Solomon’s wise judgment, the maids’ eyes gleamed with inspiration.

“Deal! I’ll feed her from this half, and you get the other.”

“Whoever makes her enjoy it more wins!”

What does that even mean?

How do you measure how well someone enjoys food?

“Alright, let’s begin!”

“Ahhh.”

In the end, I was the one being tormented again.

Someone save me.

This can’t go on.

I bolted upright in bed.

“I escaped the palace only to be harassed at home. At this rate, I won’t die of illness—I’ll die of stress!”

I had barely escaped the royal torture chamber. Now my house was one too. But I didn’t have a clear solution.

So what? I just have to take it?

No way!

Those butlers and maids had already gone half-mad—words wouldn’t work on them anymore. If they did, they’d have stopped long ago.

So Mehen?

“But Mehen’s busy…”

I knew better than anyone how overworked and swamped Mehen was. I couldn’t keep using him like a protective charm.

That left me with only one last option.

“I really didn’t want to resort to this, but…”

It’s time to use the uncle-who-gives-cash-on-holidays strategy.