Chapter 47
Same Wound
She looked as if she knew everything. And perhaps she did. The atmosphere during the dinner had probably given her a rough idea.
Damion waited for Ansi’s lips to part, as though awaiting judgment.
Finally, she spoke.
“I’m sleepy.”
“……”
“How about we talk tomorrow?”
Ansi slowly blinked. Damion swallowed dryly and reached out to cup her cheek, gently stroking her soft skin with his thumb.
“……Alright.”
Damion led Ansi to the bed.
After settling her down first, he turned off the lights and came back. Now, in the darkness, only their silhouettes were visible.
Damion silently gazed at the woman lying beside him with her eyes closed. He was grateful for her dull, seemingly indifferent nature right now.
He’d have to gather himself again to talk tomorrow, would likely spend the whole day worrying about how to bring it up… but at least, for now, he didn’t have to face it.
Then, Ansi furrowed her brow, as if something was bothering her. Damion leaned in closer to check on her.
“Damion.”
At that moment, Ansi turned onto her side. Their eyes met at close range.
“……Yes.”
“I misspoke.”
“About what?”
“It’s okay if we don’t talk tomorrow either.”
“……”
Ansi’s eyes were clear. In contrast, Damion’s eyes trembled like a candle flame in the wind.
He realized then—she had only pretended to be sleepy.
That she was saying: if it’s something you don’t want to talk about, then you don’t have to.
“Aren’t you curious?”
“I am.”
“Then why…?”
“Because it’s not something you ever chose to tell me. Just because others say you should doesn’t mean you’re obligated to.”
“……”
Moonlight from the window lit up Ansi’s face. Half of her face stood out sharply in the glow.
Her blue eyes, touched by the darkness, looked even deeper. As if he were drowning in those eyes, Damion felt his breath catch in his throat.
He gently reached for her hand.
Earlier, the back of his neck had tingled—now it just felt hot. Even in the north, even at night, it was still summer after all.
The quiet chirping of summer insects softly echoed through the room, a sound never heard in the capital.
Damion suddenly thought of the fact that he was here with her in this house.
Not just him and the duke’s family—but his family and the duke’s family were now both present here in this vast estate of Sobelvio. Before coming here, on the way here, and now in this very moment.
“The Duchess… is not my biological mother.”
At his quiet confession, Ansi’s eyelids slightly trembled. Whether she had expected it or not, she seemed surprised.
But Damion knew—her surprise didn’t mean she rejected him.
“I’m the Duke’s illegitimate son. I was born in the South and lived with my mother until I joined the Orphe ducal house when I was eight.”
His subdued voice continued. After quietly listening, Ansi spoke.
“Then your birth mother…”
“She passed away. When I was eight.”
“What kind of person was she?”
“I don’t remember much. But the mother I do recall… was someone who deeply regretted having me. And yet, loved me more than anyone.”
Damion gave a bitter smile.
Ansi looked at him quietly. Her heart ached, as if someone had reached in and twisted it. It reminded her of what she felt when she saw Damion’s death and tried to save him.
It was strange. He wasn’t dead now. She wasn’t trying to save him.
Maybe when they became each other’s partners through marriage—bound by the family’s contract with the god Amor—she had offered her heart to that god. And maybe that’s why these emotions would sometimes rush over her.
Perhaps even these words now, flowing from her mouth, were a result of that.
“When my father and brother died, I was very sad… and it was hard to accept. Did you feel the same, Damion?”
“……Yes.”
“Then… your mother must’ve had more love than regret.”
Damion slowly nodded and followed her with a faint smile.
“What about your mother now?”
Ansi asked. Damion hesitated for a moment, but soon answered.
“…She raised me with love. Did you grow up with love too, Ansi?”
He turned the question back to her. He felt like he’d expose too much if he kept talking. And… he genuinely wanted to hear about her. About the time when Ansi de Orphe was still Ansi de Rubelsa.
“You’ve seen my father and mother, so you might know—I’m a bit different from them. My brother actually resembled them more. In empathy, in the variety of expressions… in how he could express boundless affection to those he loved.”
Ansi shared something she had never told anyone before.
Except for when Sophia’s fading memory brought up their names, this was the first time she mentioned their lives when they were still alive.
To Ansi, even saying their names had felt like a taboo. That’s why it had taken her over a year to visit their graves.
Even now, thinking of her father and Derel made her heart sink. But for some reason, she felt like she could talk about them now.
She didn’t even feel the weight of knowing the man she spoke to was her enemy’s younger brother.
She simply wanted to speak—to someone who had suffered the same pain, to the man who now made her feel the most at peace.
“Your brother must’ve cherished you very much.”
“Yes. But we didn’t get along that well. Derel was emotional and dumb. We fought every day.”
At her sharp critique, Damion chuckled.
“From what I’ve heard, Captain Rubelsa was a capable soldier with a cool head.”
“Are you taking his side?”
“Well, we were both soldiers. Hard not to be biased.”
“I’m your wife.”
Ansi played her trump card. Hearing her define their relationship with her own lips left Damion at a loss for words.
“……Even if he was composed, I doubt he could match your wisdom.”
“Exactly.”
Ansi giggled. A small glint sparkled in her eyes. Though tears welled up, she smiled.
Damion looked at her, entranced.
Even as he revealed flaws that no one else knew, even as he received comfort from this curt woman…
He couldn’t yet speak of the fact that the Orphe family had never truly accepted him as one of their own. That as a child, he had once thrown himself into water, wishing to die, because he found this place unbearable.
Would he ever be able to say those things?
Damion reached out and gently wiped the tears from her eyes.
He felt that maybe, even if it was at the moment of his death—if she were by his side—he could finally speak of it.
And to make that happen…
A tangled web of thoughts once again crept up through his body.
Damion stopped thinking. He decided to focus only on what he was sure of.
And what he was certain of, was that right now—he wanted to kiss this woman.
Their lips met.
The moonlit lips of the woman were sweet. As he lingered within the softness of her mouth, his mind became a stormy mess.
He restrained his wandering hands with reason, and more reason, and even more reason—desperately holding himself back.
He admitted it now. Though he once said he could wait for her forever—waiting, in truth, was an immense hardship.
“Good night.”
With lips still wet, the woman fell asleep. The blanket tucked just under her chin, she soon began breathing softly.
In the room, filled with the sound of her breathing and the chirping of insects, peace reigned.
It was just… unbearably hot, his heart thumped wildly, and the night stretched on and on.
“It’ll be a busy day. From the main hall to the annex, and even the nearby lake—there’s so much to see.”
As they descended the stairs together to the first floor, Bekishi smiled. When she smiled, the slight droop at the corners of her eyes made her even more charming.
“Thank you for guiding me.”
“Oh, it’s nothing. Is there anywhere you’d like to see first?”
“Hmm…”
Ansi had read about Sobelvio before, but she lacked spatial awareness. Just reading descriptions didn’t help her imagine what places looked like, so they didn’t impress her much.
Luckily, Bekishi made a suggestion.
“There’s the Emperor’s Room on the first floor. Ever since the first Emperor of Belgader stayed at Sobelvio, every emperor has used that room during visits. It’s usually kept empty. It’s grand yet refined. Shall we start there?”
“That sounds good.”
Ansi answered immediately. If the Emperor used that room when visiting Sobelvio, it would be better to check it in advance in case anything happened.
She felt a bit guilty as Bekishi enthusiastically guided her around, unaware of Ansi’s real motives—but she explored Sobelvio with her own goals in mind.
After touring the main spaces from the first to the fourth floor, they walked through the well-maintained gardens. Behind the vast rear garden was a large lake. White sunlight shimmered on its emerald surface, scattering brilliant reflections.
“Beautiful, right? Just after 2 PM—this is when I love this lake the most.”
Bekishi’s gaze danced over the lake. She seemed entirely different from how she’d been during dinner the night before.
Back then, she had seemed quiet and timid.
Maybe that impression had come from how little she smiled or spoke.
“Bekishi, I heard you’ve been married for three years. Is that right?”
She nodded.
A woman who had spent three years with Cardian. Did she know what kind of man her husband really was?
