[CHAPTER 74]
“Your Excellency?”
Huh?
Your Excellency?
For a moment, I thought I had misheard.
“Your Excellency” was clearly a form of address reserved for the High Priest.
‘Did he call the wrong person?’
‘No, but how could someone mess up a title like that?’
Flustered, my gaze wandered.
The priest who had spoken was clearly looking in one direction.
Toward the young priest with the strange way of speaking, who was drinking the lemon juice I had given him as if it were the water of life.
* * *
After crossing the city walls and entering the capital, Sian, the High Priest, and Seria all followed the people who had come to greet them toward the temple.
Only after their figures had completely disappeared did Jahar Knox let out a deep breath, as if finally releasing one he had been holding in.
“Wow, that really surprised me.”
“That was my first time seeing the High Priest.”
Yeah.
I was surprised too.
I never imagined that young priest would be the High Priest.
‘I did think he must be impressive, considering he could purify madok.’
But who would have expected the one who rushed over to heal a holy knight to be the High Priest himself?
On top of that, the divine power he gave off outwardly felt no stronger than that of a slightly capable priest.
He must have been concealing even his divine power to hide his identity.
‘I heard he was incredibly old.’
They say people with strong divine power hardly age.
I never thought I would confirm that in this way.
Still, was this really okay?
‘If he were an ordinary priest, maybe not, but as the High Priest, he might have recognized who I am.’
No, he must have recognized me.
There was no way someone of his rank would not, even if I was concealing my mana and presence right now.
I had planned to avoid the temple’s notice as much as possible, but things were already going wrong from the start.
Impatience crept in, and my clenched fist tightened unconsciously.
That was when it happened.
“Well then, I should get going.”
Jahar Knox suddenly spoke as he adjusted his clothes.
“Where are you going?”
“What do you mean, where?”
“I only came to the capital in the first place because the Mage Tower summoned me.”
“I’m already running late, so I’d better hurry.”
He answered as if it were obvious, then waved his hand and walked away.
“Shall we get moving too?”
Ifrit, Noah, and Ratia were the same.
They all acted as if they each had somewhere to go.
Everyone except me.
‘Ah…… this feeling.’
The feeling that everyone else had a place to return to.
It was an emotion I had not felt in a long time.
Seeing everyone with somewhere to go, while I alone remained floating in place, eventually made me feel unbearably sad.
It was a feeling I often had right after regressing.
I felt a vague fear that if I closed my eyes and opened them again, I would be lying in a bed in the Demon King’s castle, starting over alone while no one remembered me.
Where was I supposed to go?
As I stood there blankly, I felt someone tug on my sleeve.
“You don’t look so good.”
“Are you okay?”
Ratia’s face suddenly popped into view in front of me.
She had been glued to Ifrit just moments ago, so when did she come over here?
Her eyes were full of concern as she looked at me.
“Is it because you got separated from Sian?”
“Huh?”
“Sian asked me to give you this.”
With a soft rustle, Ratia pulled something out of her sleeve and held it out to me.
‘A note?’
What she handed me was a small, torn piece of paper.
There had been times when enduring countless lives alone did not bother me at all.
Until not long ago, that had been the case.
But not anymore.
I had to acknowledge that I had changed.
‘I’ve grown weak.’
‘At this rate, I’ll only waste more energy on unnecessary emotions.’
Even knowing it was inefficient, I could not stop my heart from changing.
Sian’s kindness, Ratia’s innocence, and the warmth of Jahar Knox, Ifrit, and Noah slowly changed me, like clothes soaked by a steady drizzle.
And that change…… was not something I disliked at all.
A faint, lonely smile formed on my lips.
If I failed in this life and regressed again, they would remember nothing.
‘All those shared times and memories that only I remember.’
‘How insignificant must they be?’
Thinking that way, I built walls around myself and locked myself in.
I chose not to be hurt, even if it meant being isolated.
I thought that was enough……
‘Ah.’
‘So I was actually very lonely.’
My chest tightened at this tiny scrap of kindness.
I clenched the note tightly in my hand.
“Jerena?”
I shook my head at Ifrit, who had been waiting without an answer for a while.
“Thank you, but I’ll pass.”
“Where are you planning to stay?”
I smiled faintly and showed him the note.
“He went so far as to leave a note in such a hurry.”
“I can’t just ignore that.”
I said it boldly, even as I spoke.
* * *
‘I should have ignored it.’
Sometimes, it would have been better not to accept even good intentions.
‘I should have listened to Ifrit!’
The moment I arrived at the Alistair estate, I regretted it.
It was not because they ignored me or mistreated me in any way.
Thanks to Sian’s advance notice, the people of the Alistair family treated me with exceptional kindness, as Sian’s guest.
……Yes.
As “Sian’s guest.”
“Haaah……”
I let out a deep sigh and set down my teacup.
The tea table was filled with beautiful cups brimming with tea and all sorts of elaborate pastries.
They were luxuries far beyond what a commoner could ever hope to see.
The problem was that dishes like these appeared at every single meal.
It had been two days since I arrived at the Alistair estate, which meant at least six meals had been this extravagant so far.
Including the snacks they brought out several times a day, it was easily ten servings.
And whenever I tried to take a walk outside my room, those sparkling, expectant gazes followed me relentlessly.
‘Are they trying to fatten me up before eating me or something?’
The fact that such a thought crossed my mind at all said everything.
No matter how oblivious I might be, even I could tell how they saw me.
‘……They seem to think of me as Sian’s prospective fiancée.’
Otherwise, there was no way to explain the looks in the servants’ eyes.
And most decisively, there was the servant’s slip of the tongue I overheard during a walk.
“Would you like a parasol, little lady of the house…… ah, no.”
The sheer panic in her eyes was unmistakable.
She even confessed that the title they had been using among themselves had slipped out by mistake.
There was no way I could not realize it.
‘I told you to explain things in advance, Sir Sian.’
‘Just what on earth did you tell them?’
No matter how much I screamed silently, there was no one to answer.
Since the day we arrived in the capital, Sian had been shut away in the temple and had not come to the estate even once.
‘If I’d known this would happen, I should have gone with Ifrit.’
Resting my chin in my hand, I gazed out the window.
Sir Sian, please come quickly……
It was a more desperate wish than ever before.
Even though it would never reach him.
