[CHAPTER 68]
Was it sincere?
Could I really return?
To the place where I originally lived?
“You can send me back to where I want to go?”
“Yes.”
It was a radical proposal.
Is this some kind of trick?
If I say I just want to die right now, can I escape this cycle of regression?
Could I finally find the death, the rest, I have longed for?
“Then I—”
Before I could even steel my resolve, my voice slipped out between my lips.
But I could not finish my sentence.
Within the distorted space, Sian’s face looked far too desperate.
Hey, are you out of your mind?
Do you have any idea how incredible this opportunity is?
If you miss this chance, you might never escape the cycle again.
You know that.
Sensing my wavering resolve, I scolded myself.
But my mouth would not open easily.
If I return to my original world or choose death, then Jerena, as she is now, will truly die.
Then what about Sian?
He was someone who had already abandoned everything and vowed to stay by my side simply because he had saved me and remained in the Demon Realm.
What would happen if he believed I died after absorbing the poison from his body?
Would he be okay?
Honestly, I can barely handle myself, and now I am worrying about someone else too.
This was exactly why I never wanted to grow attached to anyone.
Even focusing solely on my own affairs was not enough, yet others inevitably became part of my considerations.
After hesitating and moving my lips for a long while, I finally made my decision.
“…Send me back.”
“Where to?”
Without answering, I raised my hand and pointed somewhere.
The tip of my finger was directed at Sian.
The place I would return to was ultimately there.
“That’s unexpected.”
“Of course it is.
You only offered me one real choice from the start.”
Thinking about it calmly, none of this made sense from the beginning.
The me who lived in reality had clearly died.
The very reason I fell into this cycle was because of an “after-death possession insurance.”
And asking to be allowed to rest peacefully as I was…
That was never an option presented by the World Tree.
It was just something I had wondered, thinking, “Maybe that’s possible.”
If a single word from me were enough to free me from the cycle, it would not have simply watched as I suffered so much.
You psychopath.
Are all beings that transcend humanity like this?
Noah and Ifrit were not like this at all.
Suppressing the revulsion rising sharply in my chest, I faced him.
“So you noticed.
Yes, if you had asked to be sent back to where you lived, I would have been deeply disappointed in you.”
He laughed.
Though his face was hidden behind a veil, I could tell from the feeling alone.
He seemed pleased, yet at the same time looked at me with curiosity, like a clever beast.
Either way, it did not feel good.
He’s having a one-man festival in his own head.
I was in the middle of hurling every curse I knew at him internally when—
“How irreverent.”
At his words, spoken as if he knew everything, I snapped my mouth shut.
“But do not misunderstand.
I simply could not hear you because I had not fully awakened yet.
I truly did intend to send you.”
I did not believe him.
“Believe it or not, it does not matter.”
“Did I say that out loud just now?”
At my almost naïve question, the World Tree chuckled softly.
“You know I will come to see you again next time, don’t you?”
“Yes.
You made a deal with my children.”
“Then please grant me one request next time.
Truly.”
“Hmm?”
The World Tree stroked his chin as he looked at me.
“Why should I?”
“You said you would grant a request.”
Having heard the answer I wanted, a faint smile formed on my lips.
The World Tree watched me for a moment, then reached out his hand toward me.
“You finally smile.”
The tips of his fingers touched my forehead.
And then—
Tap.
He pushed my forehead lightly.
It did not feel like a strong blow, yet strangely, strength drained from my body.
Like a doll with its strings cut, I fell backward just like that.
And then…
***
I opened my eyes.
“Gasp.”
“Jerena!”
Startled, I jolted my upper body upright, and the person sitting beside me called my name.
I did not need to look to know who it was.
“Sir Sian…”
“A physician— no, Ifrit— no…”
At the sight of Sian panicking, I placed my hand over the back of his hand.
It was meant to calm him.
Sian flinched and looked down at me.
In his eyes as he gazed at me were relief, sorrow, anger, and countless other emotions mixed together.
When his trembling lips finally parted, his voice was filled with fury.
“Why did you do it?”
“Do what… exactly?”
“Everything.
All of it!”
Sian raised his voice, something rare for him.
“You knew using my sword would put too much strain on me, yet you still faced the demon yourself.
You absorbed the demonic poison into your own body just to draw it out of mine.”
……
“Why do you keep sacrificing yourself like that?
Are you a saintess?”
I had nothing to say except that, at the time, it was the best choice.
Was it not so?
To prevent the poison introduced into his body from spreading, Sian needed to remain as still as possible.
And Retion had targeted me from the beginning.
It was true that Sian’s sword, being a holy sword, put more strain on him, but its power was greater, so in the end, it worked out.
And I had something to rely on.
No matter what kind of attack Retion used, I believed I could endure at least one blow.
I had the bracelet Noah gave me, and the necklace from Jahar Knox.
Sian was surely aware of those artifacts as well.
Absorbing the poison into my own body was the same logic.
If I died, I would simply regress, but if Sian died, that would be the end for him.
But if I say that, he will just get angrier.
Not that I could explain regression to him anyway.
I decided to keep my mouth shut in the posture of a guilty party.
There are times when one should speak, and times when one should not.
“Never do that again.
Ever.”
“Okay.”
I answered obediently and looked up at Sian.
He must have been truly furious, because his face was flushed.
Especially around the eyes.
“Did you cry?”
“What?
No.”
They say strong denial is strong affirmation.
I desperately held back the comment I wanted to add.
If I teased him now, I had no idea how much more his anger would grow.
Sian, who looked ready to launch into a long lecture, seemed to realize this was not the time and rose to his feet.
“I will call Ifrit first.
The others as well.”
It seemed he intended to inform the rest of the group that I had awakened.
I quickly grabbed Sian’s hand.
As he turned, Sian stopped moving.
“Sir Sian, just a moment.
There’s something I want to say before that.”
“…Go ahead.”
His expression clearly said, “What are you going to say now?”
I let out a small laugh and, smiling, spoke to him.
“Shall we part ways now?”
