TFLMLD 62

Chapter 62

The Embodiment of Jealousy

Strangely, seeing Macaron with such a serious expression felt like a demon I’d hidden deep in my heart had been summoned.

“What if something goes wrong?”

Macaron was momentarily flustered by my teasing tone and stammered.

“Ah, no… it’s nothing.”

“No? That’s not true. If something went wrong, were you planning to marry another woman?”

The word marriage made Macaron gasp in surprise, waving his hands frantically as his face flushed bright red, confessing his true feelings.

“If anything happened to my wife, I wouldn’t have been able to live either.”

Honestly, I had asked just to hear that, and his answer was even more satisfying than I expected. Watching Macaron lower his head shyly as if he’d committed a grave crime made me grin. I barely restrained myself, pretending to brush my hands through the air, letting my eyes playfully glint.

“If you say things like that so openly…”

Pausing, Macaron gently lifted his head.

“That’s fine.”

At my words, Macaron’s eyes glimmered with a seductive charm. How could every single expression of his be so handsome? It was almost faster to find something unattractive about him. He seemed excited about something, and then, without changing his expression, he said something embarrassingly earnest:

“In my next life, I’ll come to find you, my wife.”

Next life? This life isn’t even over yet—did I hear that correctly?

“Next life?”

I wanted to dissect Macaron’s brain to see what kind of structure could allow such a statement. It might sound cruel, but I didn’t mean it negatively. I was simply amazed at his determination. Silence lingered for a moment after such an unexpected statement. Meanwhile, Macaron slouched his broad back in a sullen manner.

“Do you dislike it?”

Who could say no to those eyes, lowered like a pitiful puppy? But…

“Wouldn’t it be okay to meet someone else in the next life?”

Yet imagining Macaron with another woman made me feel strangely uneasy—even though we were just talking about a next life, and it was purely hypothetical. The absurdity of feeling this way made me chuckle softly. At that moment, I felt Macaron’s crimson eyes staring straight at me. I could easily guess that in his imagination, my husband in the next life might have been “killed” several times. Unfortunately, when our eyes met, I was laughing, and Macaron seemed to think I was imagining another man.

“If I lack something, I’ll fix it. I’ll study various characters so you’ll never get bored.”

It was tempting to see Macaron in other ‘characters,’ but I couldn’t let myself witness the cruel imaginations running through his mind—and that sulky back of his, too.

“I’m joking.”

Macaron still wore a slightly pouting face.

“…I don’t think that’s a joke.”

“In my next life, I’ll wait for you, Your Highness.”

Finally seeming relieved, Macaron picked up his teacup. I added a stern warning, gazing at him sharply.

“If you don’t come to find me, be prepared for the consequences.”

“…!”

Macaron set his teacup down politely, his face as if he might spit out the tea. Perhaps pleased with my bold words, he brightened instantly, like a sunflower blooming after a cloud. It was funny how happy he could be over a story that would likely never happen. I knew why he tried to lighten the mood even with a pained expression. None of us ever mentioned that story, but Evelyn’s memory lingered in his mind. I felt both pity and gratitude that he was making such an effort. Still, I was also uneasy that he had never brought up Evelyn.

‘If there were no connection, wouldn’t Macaron bring it up first?’

‘Or is it because it’s a relationship too close to deny?’

Instead of staying in this uneasy state, it seemed better to ask Macaron directly. For a moment, the only sound in the silent room was the clinking of tea. As I considered when to bring it up, Macaron spoke first.

“Evelyn was one of the many women who chased after me.”

I had wondered if he had some precognition—sometimes it felt like Macaron might have telepathy. He didn’t just say “a woman,” he said many women. Though a little boastful, it didn’t feel unpleasant. I liked that Evelyn was described as just one among many. My lips twitched in a small smile, but I quickly suppressed it, worried he might misinterpret it as mockery.

“Is that so?”

Thankfully, Macaron seemed unaware of my subtle reaction, earnestly explaining his relationship with Evelyn.

“That’s all there is to it.”

“I see.”

The brief silence created an unfamiliar stillness. As I set down my teacup, Macaron was staring at me intently.

“You shouldn’t scrunch up such a pretty face.”

I had been trying to hide a smile, but apparently, my face was scrunched. I touched it, but it didn’t help. Macaron pressed his fingers to his own brow as if demonstrating, and when I followed, the crease smoothed slightly. Somehow, Macaron looked like he was holding back laughter at the situation.

“So this is what it feels like when someone you like likes you back.”

“…?”

Why was he suddenly saying that? He smiled as I watched, puzzled.

“I heard you were angry at me.”

Could he have overheard the conversation with Evelyn?

‘He couldn’t have heard it directly… but then who could?’

Feeling guilty, I took a step back.

“When did I?”

The conversation with Evelyn replayed in my mind. If Macaron had heard it, I’d probably kick my blanket in frustration. Trying to act calm, I set down my teacup, and Macaron made a mock-angry face.

‘What bait is he setting up to say next?’

Swallowing nervously, I watched as Macaron crossed his arms and scowled, then said something I’d heard somewhere before.

“Stop holding onto another woman’s husband.”

Had I really done that? I was too shocked to respond. Truthfully, Macaron’s acting was so convincing that my face flushed. I could only hope he hadn’t seen it for real. If he had, the embarrassment would have been unbearable. Though I hadn’t done anything wrong, having my inner thoughts laid bare felt humiliating.

“Who said that?”

I vaguely guessed it must have been Lord Momont—he and Eve were the only ones present. Eve wouldn’t have done it… how could I tell Macaron everything word-for-word? Just as my anger toward Momont was about to flare, Macaron finally noticed my serious expression and read my reaction. Then, earnestly, he explained.

“Momont didn’t try to listen; he just worried and happened to hear it.”

Macaron’s tearful defense of his loyal friend softened me a little. Today, he looked paler than usual and wary, which made me feel tender toward him. But if I relaxed now, I would regret it endlessly tonight. Embarrassed but determined, I placed my hands on my waist and stared at him boldly. Macaron raised his head but paused at my sharp gaze, lowering his long lashes like a forlorn cat. Silence settled in the room, and he suddenly spoke out of nowhere.

“…I also struggled a lot.”

What was that about? His confession left me both startled and confused.

‘Could he be talking about that day?’

The conversation with Evelyn flashed through my mind. I had only spoken a little firmly to get her to leave…

‘He’s not saying it’s hard because I’m clingy, right?’

How had Momont reported this…?

“What do you mean?”

I asked nonchalantly but secretly trembled. Macaron whimpered like a hurt puppy as if he had a confession he couldn’t share, then finally spoke.

“Shufen is in this house…”

‘Why is Shufen coming up now?’

When our eyes met, Macaron clamped his mouth shut.

“No, it’s nothing.”

I could’ve sworn I heard a curse muttered under his breath after Shufen’s name.

“Why Shufen, then?”

He scowled as if he hated even hearing the name from me.

“It’s nothing.”

No matter how much I pressed, he refused to speak about Shufen. Only then did I sense the emotion behind the unsaid curse. Just as I’d felt irritation toward Evelyn, he must have felt the same toward Duke Shufen.

Jealousy.

I hadn’t realized it before, but I could clearly see how much Macaron had suffered. As the tension melted away, my stiff body relaxed. By then, the teacup was empty, and I stood a little quicker than usual, thinking of him. Macaron stubbornly refused my gesture, and just as I settled back on the sofa, there was a knock. He furrowed his brows and sighed deeply, and the sight made me laugh while covering my mouth. Lately, everything Macaron did was funny.

“Come in.”

It was, as expected, Lord Momont. But his expression was serious, and Macaron stiffened as well.

“What is it?”

“Well… um…”

Momont placed newspapers from one arm on the table and reported quickly.

“We found Seira.”

“Where is she now?”

“But the thing is…”