chapter 6
[It has been a very long time, Immortal.]
A god appeared, no bigger than a tiny fairy.
âThat guy!â
Noâcorrection. The one before me was a messenger of the gods.
âAh!â
I quickly moved, thinking the children must not see him.
[During all this timeâŚ]
The messenger, who had been about to ramble on, looked flustered as I lightly pushed Veris aside and grabbed him.
âYour Highness?â
âAhâit’s nothing! I was just stretching, exercising!â
I had been quietly resting, and suddenly I started moving around, so it must have looked strange. I hurriedly made an excuse, deliberately waving my arms and legs.
âI see!â
The innocent children believed even such an obvious lie. Carlisle didnât seem suspicious either.
âSo youâre not sleepy anymore?â
Ronowe said with a bright smile.
âR-right. Iâm fully awake now.â
I smiled awkwardly.
âThen play with us too, Your Highness!â
Why do these kids have so much energy? Feeling the messenger wriggling in my hand, I replied:
âNo! You go ahead and play first.â
I tightened my grip, worried he might escape.
âAwâŚâ
âOkayâŚâ
Ronowe and Veris looked disappointed, but didnât insist.
âPlease rest comfortably.â
Carlisle, who had said heâd watch over them, soon ran around with the children.
âPhewâŚâ
Good thing thereâs someone reasonable. I looked around and loosened my grip.
[Donât worry. The children cannot see me.]
The messenger flew around me once and sat to my left.
[Why is a divine messenger here? Has the god decided to forgive me?]
[Not until you find the answer.]
Not wanting to look like I was talking to thin air, I used telepathy. I didnât want to be mistaken for a madwoman.
[Then why are you here? You havenât come for centuries.]
[âŚâŚ]
Then why come all this way? I frowned in irritation, but the messenger suddenly clammed up and then said something irrelevant.
[It seems this life, unlike the past ones, youâve made some interesting friends.]
Instead of answering, he observed Ronowe, Veris, and Carlisle.
âOh dear, young masters! You mustnât lie down and roll around here.â
Even the maid couldnât see him. It seemed no one nearby noticed our conversation.
âThese kids, honestlyâŚâ
I clicked my tongue internally, watching them pant in exhaustion.
âRonowe, Veris.â
Carlisle closed his book and approached them.
âDid you forget the marquis told you not to lie on the floor?â
That guyâs basically a nanny. I smirkedâthen felt the messengerâs gaze.
[Theyâre not my friends.]
Embarrassed, I denied it quickly. The messenger stared at me and said:
[Still, why not try finding the answer with their help?]
His tone softened slightly as he sipped tea.
[Are you mocking me?]
I remembered how disappointed Iâd been after placing hope in children before, and my nerves sharpened.
[I was a fool to expect anything from kids. They all just spouted nonsense.]
[Is that so? But this is your first time living like this. Perhaps itâs worth hoping this time?]
[Hope?]
A bitter laugh escaped me.
[Youâve said that many times before.]
A blonde noble lady, a woodcutter, a merchant⌠my past lives flashed before me.
What had the messenger always said? That maybe this time Iâd find the answerâfeeding me false hope.
âBut I failed every time.â
The bitterness led me to a thought I hadnât wanted to face.
[Has the god abandoned me?]
I was once favored. To be forced into endless reincarnation, only told to âfind the answerâ⌠it felt like nothing but divine rejection.
[Youâll know once you find the answer.]
The messenger repeated the same line, then casually picked up a biscuit and started eating.
âSo annoying.â
Is he even trying to have a proper conversation? I wanted to throw him.
I glared at him.
[But youâve been watching me this whole time, havenât you? Why wonât you come yourself?]
My face twisted with frustration.
[Is there even an answer? Living like this, I forget why I exist. I donât even know if I can find it!]
[Then youâll just have to live like that forever.]
Iâm being serious here! I flared up at his careless tone.
[I am serious.]
I made it clear I wouldnât let this go.
[At least give me a clue.]
I wanted to hit him, but forced myself to stay calm.
[Even the smartest people donât know the answer.]
[Iâll say this since you still donât understand: that method wonât work.]
The messenger sighed.
[Even if you receive help, the final answer must be realized by yourself. Only then will the eternal cycle end.]
I froze.
Everything Iâd doneâinterrogating scholars, relying on others, waging wars, living miserable livesâwas all wrong?
It felt like being struck by a hammer.
[Why are you telling me this only now?! Wasnât it enough just to find the answer?!]
Frustration surged; the snack in my hand crumbled.
[Though, itâs not like anyone else could find it for you anywayâŚ]
[What do you mean?]
The messenger grabbed another biscuit as I stood there confused.
[Itâs nothing.]
Crunching away, he soon prepared to leave.
[Immortal, I hope you find the answer in this life.]
And just like that, he vanishedâtaking a pile of snacks with him.
âHeyâŚ!â
I shouldâve ripped his wings off. I shouted without realizing.
âHuh?â
All three children suddenly turned to look at me like startled meerkats.
âN-no, itâs just⌠the snacks were so goodâŚâ
Seeing the empty plate made me embarrassed.
âYou mustâve been really hungry, Your Highness.â
âEat lots, Your Highness!â
The kind children took it at face value. I smiled awkwardly.
âY-yeahâŚâ
I ordered the maid to bring more snacks and leaned back on the sofa.
âLifeâŚâ
Wouldnât it be better to just disappear into a hole?
I stared blankly at the ceiling.
âYour Highness.â
Carlisle approached.
âHm?â
âIf itâs not rude, may I sit beside you?â
I nodded, curious.
âDo you have something troubling you? Your expression hasnât been good.â
I took the handkerchief he offered and wiped the crumbs from my hands.
âIf you tell me, Iâll help you think it through.â
A promising loyalistâvery different from the carefree siblings.
âWhat a waste if someone else takes him.â
I stared at him and smiled. He grew nervous.
âAh⌠umâŚâ
Such a timid kid. His flushed face made me laugh again.
âAhâsorry, I oversteppedâŚâ
âItâs fine.â
The irritation from earlier vanished.
âI was just touched that you were worried about me.â
I tapped his shoulder lightly and looked away.
âBy the way, why are you with those⌠stââ
I almost said âblockheads.â
ââŚI mean, why are you with the Fleur family children?â
It was just a casual question.
âNot important, but might as well ask.â
I watched the siblings playing oddly.
âHuh?â
No way.
âDid he just pick something off the floor and eat it?â
I nearly gagged.
âAh⌠wellâŚâ
Carlisle hesitated.
âSo there is something going on.â
Since it wasnât my place to pry, I wrapped it up.
âThe Fleur family must have good discipline.â
âAh⌠yesâŚâ
That was enough.
âBig brother~ letâs play together!â
âYour Highness, come quickly!â
These kids wonât even let me rest!
âI want to rest. You guys play by yourselves.â
I couldnât just leave, but I had no energy left.
âWhy?â
âYou wouldnât understand my worries.â
I said after a pause.
âWorries?!â
âThat startled me.â
âYou have worries, Your Highness?!â
âWow~ Your Highness has worries!â
The children rushed at me with sparkling eyes.
âLetâs solve Your Highnessâs worries!â
Waitâwhat?! Their enthusiasm was absurd.
âThatâs not the kind of problemââ
This is going badly. I tried to stop them.
âWhen Mother and Father donât know something, they go to the study!â
âThen letâs go to the study!â
Why are they deciding this on their own? I pressed my forehead.
âTheyâre way too excited.â
âRonowe, Veris. Donât run.â
As I held my head, Carlisle stepped in.
âThis is a disaster.â
I realized it was too late.
âLetâs go!â
And just like that, I was dragged along by Ronowe, who tightly grabbed my hand.