#080. Hasn’t God Always Found the Answer?
I had no memory of returning to Jasper Palace.
When I came to my senses, the Grand Duke was nowhere in sight. Only Tula was there, her face etched with worry as she cupped my cheeks.
“Were you very frightened? What should I do…? There’s no external injury, but is there any internal pain? Do you feel a cold coming on? Are your feet alright?”
I slowly assessed my current state.
My hands—intact. My feet—intact. When I lightly stepped on the floor, my legs held steady. No bones or muscles were damaged.
Tula had said there were no external injuries.
Yet, it felt as if an ice pick had pierced my insides, sharp and cold.
Touching my skin with my fingertips, I realized it was warm—so this must be a mental pain.
“…No, I’m fine.”
I forced the words out of my throat.
Tula’s worried gaze wouldn’t relent, but this was not what I needed right now.
I steadied my breathing and lifted my head.
Fixing my eyes firmly on Tula’s brown irises, I gave a resolute command.
“Tula. Tell all the children to rest and not to leave their rooms today. The same goes for you.”
Tula’s hands flinched, as if the fragile sugar-cookie I had become was slipping from her grasp.
I didn’t waver. I held her gaze.
“…Understood.”
Her hands fell away.
Where her hands had been, I felt as if frost had settled on my skin, but I endured it.
Even Tula didn’t deserve to see my weakness.
I would rather bite my tongue and die than show weakness.
After Tula left, the door shut, and a long time passed while she ensured all the children were safely in their rooms, I finally let my head drop.
Tears rolled down, soaking the carpet.
“Why….”
My head spun. Why, of all times? For what reason?
“Why, of all times….”
Even amidst the confusion, my overly sharp mind kept piecing together the information.
First, he had proposed a deal but treated me with affection as if our relationship were founded on emotions.
His ways of expressing affection were always excessive.
Beneath a seemingly fragile exterior, he was skilled at placing others in the palm of his hand and manipulating them, a shrewd political side that handled people with casual disregard while subtly performing the persona they wished to see.
I wondered how, for ten years, I had suspected he might be the reincarnated one with memory yet had failed to recognize his true identity.
Once I realized it, there could be no mistake.
There were not two people like him in this world.
I should have noticed the truth the moment I wanted to protect someone over myself.
But when my body met the master to whom I had devoted my entire previous life, I was not filled with joy.
I was consumed by despair.
“Was it truly your greatest wish to never so much as brush against my collar?”
No. Contrary to what some speculated in books about me, I did not die harboring resentment against His Majesty.
I understood why he acted as he did.
I knew that, in a true sense, he had not forsaken me.
Even though he treated me cruelly, the emperor was allowed to be so.
Moreover, according to historical records, it seemed he had cared for my daughter.
My final wish had been fulfilled, so there was no reason for me to feel resentment.
Yet still, it was true—I did not want to so much as brush against him ever again.
Even if he had not truly abandoned me.
No, it was precisely because he had not entirely abandoned me that I refused to stake my life on his fickle favor again.
Cruel, capricious favor was enough once.
More accurately, I did not want to pin my hopes on such unpredictable favor.
“Why does it have to be you?”
But why, of all people, must the second reincarnated one with memories be His Majesty?
Why must the Grand Duke, who is to be publicly announced as my fiancé tomorrow, be him?
Why, why?
Now, I was too entangled with him to escape his side.
Crushed by the weight of despair, my forehead pressed to the floor.
The rough carpet scratched my skin.
The slight pain surprisingly helped clear my mind. I opened my tear-filled eyes as wide as I could and murmured:
“…No. Hasn’t God always found the answer?”
Yes. I had always found the answer, even if it led to my death.
So I could find the answer this time too.
A way to escape from His Majesty’s side, a way to be free.
I pressed my forehead into the carpet one last time and then went to the bathroom, turning on the water.
Cooling my face with cold water brought a sense of clarity.
“─At least my objective is clear.”
Escape from the Grand Duke… from His Majesty’s side. I truly did not wish for a second proposal…
Then, I realized a crucial fact.
“…This will be the second proposal even for Blanche.”
One proposal I received as Ibaekryeon, and one as Blanche.
The proposal Ibaekryeon received could be ignored as if it never happened. The proposal Blanche received lacked emotional attachment, so it was harmless.
What I truly had to fear was the second proposal.
The second proposal His Majesty might make after knowing me.
“The timing is too tight.”
Tomorrow, during the Huya Festival, he would make a verbal announcement of our engagement.
The official ceremony would be after the academy graduation, and the wedding even later, but if I wanted to reverse things, it was better to act before the verbal announcement.
“Hmm. I have two immediate options…”
One, the party that made my horse bolt today. The other, Princess Starte, who harbored resentment toward me.
Either could serve as an excuse to cancel the engagement.
“Fortunately, preparations to frame someone are already in place.”
Though intended to benefit His Majesty, the plan to use me as bait to identify adversaries had already been set in motion.
The horse incident earlier had perfectly fallen into that trap.
The problem was that provoking a sufficiently big incident to cancel the engagement wasn’t easy.
I was bait, not a sacrificial lamb.
“…I don’t want to cross a dangerous path, but it can’t be helped.”
I swallowed a sigh and opened the cabinet. Deep inside, a glass bottle reflected a sinister light.
The sky over the Huya Festival was clear, as if it had never rained.
The Grand Duke, now noticeably free of worry, spun around with a glass of non-alcoholic champagne, while Princess Lamore displayed her graceful poise beside him.
“What a picturesque pair.”
Yesterday, rumors had already spread about how the Grand Duke had carried the lost Princess Blanche back home.
Both were beautiful, noble, and appeared close, creating a very satisfying sight for the adults.
The emperor, however, interrupted the private world of the children whispering to each other.
“Now, we must toast. Take the non-alcoholic glasses prepared for you.”
He handed over the deliberately prepared champagne. The Grand Duke received two glasses, passing one to the princess.
“Here.”
“Thank you.”
The princess smiled elegantly as she accepted the glass.
The emperor moved slightly to the center of the hall and addressed the attendees, praising them and offering standard compliments.
Being someone who disliked pomp, his speech was brief.
“May the glory of the empire endure forever.”
“May the glory of the empire endure forever!”
After the emperor’s toast, everyone raised their glasses.
─Ah.
As attention returned to the princess due to a faint cry, her glass was tilted halfway, spilling its contents.
“Huh? What happened?”
The Grand Duke beside her tilted his head in confusion, inspecting her.
Did she spill it by accident? For a moment, I thought so. But then she raised her other hand to her mouth.
“Your Highness, your glass…”
Before she could finish, blood trickled between her fingers.
“…Blanche?”
The Grand Duke’s gaze faltered.
He dropped the glass he had been holding and supported the princess with both hands.
“Call the palace guards immediately!”
Everyone realized something was wrong as cries rang out.
Yet Princess Blanche herself made no sound.
Unable to control her body, her hand dropped, and a gush of blood spouted from her mouth.
“Blanche!”
“My…”
Her fragile voice broke. Silver lashes fell over her dark eyes.
Once again, blood erupted, staining her red lips.
