#074. Please Give Me the Chance to Resolve This
Everything had been flowing smoothly — as you could tell from how events were unfolding.
I was attending the imperial family’s dinners, treated as the Archduke’s consort in all but name.
Perhaps it was because my blunt reprimand of Marquis Chase had been effective, or maybe the plan the Archduke and I carried out worked a little too well — but the rumors of discord between us had finally subsided.
The notorious adulterous couple who had been such a headache for me were now under the sole charge of the Empress Dowager. She was apparently doing a fine job of mediating between the Kingdom of Dalin, the Melek family, and the Mastera family.
Little by little, the many issues that had weighed me down were being resolved.
If things went as planned, the Hunting Festival would take place, our engagement would be announced, and soon after I would be able to take refuge at the Academy — spending several years in relative peace.
I had just begun to look ahead to that bright, optimistic future when the news reached me.
“…What?”
It wasn’t that I had misheard, nor that I failed to understand. I simply found it impossible to accept.
With a pale face, Tula repeated herself.
“Lady Starte and Young Master Mastera attempted a double suicide. Fortunately, their attempt failed, but both are unconscious.”
Even hearing it again, the words were unbelievable. A peace envoy from another nation and the fiancé of an imperial noble attempting suicide together.
“They’ve gone utterly mad.”
Since Tula was the only one present, I could speak so bluntly, but the fact that I said it aloud showed how shaken I was.
Just hearing it made my head ache.
“See if His Highness the Archduke can meet me today, right away… No, never mind. I’ll go to the Starlight Palace myself.”
“Yes, understood.”
Since I always dressed neatly, there was no need to change clothes before meeting him.
Leaving Tula behind at the palace just in case, I headed straight to the Starlight Palace in my current attire. As expected, the place was already in turmoil. Of course it would be.
I felt bad disturbing them when they were so busy, but the matter was urgent. I approached the chamberlain I already knew and asked,
“I wish to see His Highness the Archduke. Is that possible?”
The chamberlain, though visibly harried, treated me with courtesy. Bowing quickly, he guided me inside.
“…You acted swiftly. The news only just arrived.”
The Archduke greeted me with an unusually tense, irritable expression.
His features were already finely sculpted, but with such delicate, tangled emotions flickering across them, he looked as though he might shatter at any moment.
“I thought it best to discuss countermeasures in person. Would that be all right?”
“Yes. At this point, neither of us can be considered outsiders anymore. Shall we talk over tea? I woke early this morning and have a headache.”
He frowned slightly, pressing at his temple. I instructed the chamberlain behind me to fetch tea, then stepped further into the room.
“May I touch you, just for a moment?”
“Why so formal? You always have my permission.”
If he still had room for such a jest, then the situation wasn’t yet catastrophic. I reached out and gently massaged his head. Applying pressure to the right points often helped with headaches.
Before long, the Archduke closed his eyes.
“You must be training diligently. Even with those small hands, your grip is surprisingly strong.”
“Fortunately, I seem to have a knack for swordsmanship.”
I massaged for a short while until the chamberlain knocked. Clearly, tea had been prepared in advance, ready to be brought at any moment since the Archduke had been working since dawn.
I withdrew my hand and sat opposite him. Hot tea was served, and we both added more sugar than usual.
Only after drinking half his cup did the Archduke finally speak.
“First, some good news: neither of them is in critical condition. They ingested poison, but thankfully it was quickly identified and the antidote administered.”
Damn it. I nearly cursed aloud, swallowing it down with the hot tea.
So instead of poisoning Lady Melek, they went and drank poison themselves? And since the poison was easily identified and the antidote administered in time, they clearly never intended to die.
With Lady Starte’s skills, she could have crafted an instant-acting toxin, and if she had made the poison herself, she could also have erased its traces, leaving its identity unknown. Then their suicide would have succeeded without fail.
So this was nothing more than a staged protest — a reckless, childish outcry. Was this really what people in their mid-twenties should be doing? I was appalled.
“The Melek family, siding with their daughter, rejected reconciliation. The Mastera family was cornered, unable to raise their heads, and the Kingdom of Dalin declared they would recall Lady Starte. The plan was: after the Hunting Festival and our engagement announcement, Lady Starte would quietly return to her homeland, while Young Master Mastera would retreat to the countryside with Lady Melek, under the excuse of convalescence, until the scandal died down.”
Utter foolishness.
“A poor choice. Persuading Lady Melek instead would have been far more effective.”
I softened my words, not to sound too harsh.
The Archduke gave me a faint smile, showing he thought the same.
Neither of us believed they truly intended to die. Their attempt was meaningless — nothing but immature defiance.
The Mastera family might indulge their son’s tantrums, but the Kingdom of Dalin would not reverse its decisions over such a stunt. If Lady Starte were truly so precious, they would never have sent her as a hostage in the first place.
This was only a delay of the inevitable farewell. Once she recovered, Dalin would still summon her home. Their circumstances would remain unchanged.
But for us, the trouble was just beginning.
“I owe you an apology. I should have asked Her Majesty the Dowager to intervene earlier.”
The entire discord had sprung from their affair in the first place. Which meant society already knew the Archduke and I had interfered between them.
And now — a double suicide attempt? We would be blamed immediately. Perhaps more than him, since he had advised reconciliation, the backlash might fall squarely on me.
Worse, since the Dowager was officially overseeing the matter at the time of the attempt, people would be reluctant to blame her — and all the more eager to shift responsibility onto me.
“No, if anything, the fault lies with me for meddling in the first place.”
Maybe because of the lofty position awaiting me, I had overstepped, acting beyond what my age and current station warranted.
Despite our verbal engagement and the fact that the Archduchess’s position was essentially that of the future Empress, my official standing was still merely as the Archduke’s childhood companion.
And I was far too young to involve myself in such sordid affairs.
Even those around me had kept me in the dark for that reason. Even if the Archduke had hinted at things, I could have — should have — simply pretended not to know.
The sense of responsibility I’d felt to resolve this matter was nothing more than a lingering habit from my previous life.
“My first step was poorly made.”
Had I not felt that misplaced responsibility, perhaps some of the current troubles wouldn’t exist.
There would have been no cause for rumors of discord, and in this affair too, no one would have dared insult the imperial family on behalf of an adulterous couple. The matter might have been quietly buried.
Of course, I didn’t believe everything was my fault.
There would always be people who hated me, who wanted to pull me down from the position of Archduchess.
But still, the question of justification…
By making mistakes, I had given them grounds to attack me. A bitter taste filled my mouth. I had never made such errors in my previous life.
In this life, I had tried to live differently — to restrain my abilities, to live as an ordinary person. Was this what an ordinary life was supposed to be? Stumbling, erring, reflecting?
Troublesome indeed.
As my expression darkened, the Archduke lightly brushed his hand against my cheek.
“I told you — this isn’t your fault. You overthink too much. …Once the Hunting Festival is over, before you enter the Academy, shall we go on a short trip? The northern lands I once mentioned have fresh, clear air. It would do you good.”
His words were so gentle. Even while burdened with this headache of a matter, he still had the presence of mind to care for me. Truly, he was a man worthy of becoming Emperor.
Then, to remain at his side, I too must be prepared. If mistakes were inevitable, at the very least I should be the one to resolve them.
I clasped the hand resting on my cheek and looked into his blue eyes.
“Your Highness. Please give me the chance to handle this matter.”
His hand twitched beneath mine. But I did not avert my gaze. After a moment of silence, he sighed and withdrew his hand.
“…Yes, that’s the kind of person you are. Very well — do as you wish.”
“Thank you, for always trusting me.”
I folded my hands back onto my lap and smiled.
