ILTDAMH|CHAPTER 125

Chapter 125

Ruan’s Gift (2)

“You look so happy. Especially with the way you’re holding this child—it’s as if you have the whole world in your hands. Ruan’s parents must have really loved him. Oh my, he was such a little rascal when he was young. Heh, I enjoy climbing trees myself—did Ruan like climbing trees too?”

Mercian smiled at the sight of young Ruan climbing a tree in the painting. 

Ruan hugged her from behind and said softly:

“I don’t remember it clearly, but it wasn’t so much that I liked it as that I liked the challenge. According to my aunt, whenever someone said I was too young to do something, I would try to accomplish it the next day no matter what.”

Ruan pointed to a painting where he was proudly standing atop a tree.

“This painting shows the first time I ever climbed a tree. According to my aunt, there was a squirrel up there, and I tried to catch it. They told me I was too young to climb the tree, so I secretly dragged a ladder over to climb it—but I fell.”

“Oh my! Did you get hurt badly?”

“Of course. I broke my leg and had to stay in bed for four months.”

“So you didn’t climb a tree again for a while, I suppose?”

“Not at all. The moment I got out of bed, I went back to climbing trees. Though, of course, I fell again. I was only six years old, so my small height made climbing the ladder difficult. The second time, I stayed in bed for about two months.”

“You didn’t… climb again after that, did you? Oh my, now I see you smiling with joy in this tree here. So you eventually succeeded?”

“Of course. It only took four tries.”

“That’s incredible persistence. Usually, when someone falls from a tree the first time, they don’t even go near it for a while.”

“Persistence isn’t the right word—it’s more like I hated losing. And this portrait is from when I was seven, the first time I held a sword. I may be bragging, but after less than three years of sword training, I was skilled enough that few children my age could match me. And this one….”

The small paintings in the room depicted key moments of Ruan’s life: his entrance into the academy, his first military expedition, and more. Ruan held Mercian’s hand and pointed to each one, explaining them in detail.

As Mercian looked over the paintings, she noticed something peculiar.

“Ruan, did your aunt paint all of these?”

“Yes. My father had many portraits of my mother painted, and the ducal family had an official artist. So my aunt had the same artist paint my portraits, and they were all placed here.”

“But the paintings of you until age twelve have such natural expressions, like a real child—but after that, they seem emotionless. No feelings at all.”

“After I started training in swordsmanship and joined the knights, I focused on carrying on the ducal legacy. I thought it was my way of repaying my aunt for raising me. My official first expedition was at fifteen, though I actually went to the battlefield for the first time at twelve.”

“Twelve years old? On a battlefield?”

That’s impossible—he was still a child.

“It was a kind of self-test. Of course, I didn’t kill anyone or directly fight, but I devised strategies and led operations.”

“Strategies at twelve? I can’t believe it.”

“My teacher, Sir Jenerd—Tablo’s father—led the troops. I presented my strategies to him, and he approved, allowing me to participate in the battle. By winning that war, I earned recognition, and at fifteen I led the troops myself. I realized I couldn’t show emotions in battle, and from that point on, I learned to hide my feelings.”

At fifteen, he went to war and learned to hide his emotions? At only fifteen? I had a difficult life too, but Ruan’s was far from easy.

Mercian felt a pang of sympathy and hugged him tightly, patting his back.

“You’ve been through so much. It must have been terrifying and exhausting at such a young age. Thank you for enduring it all.”

Ruan was slightly embarrassed by her comfort but didn’t dislike it. In fact, it felt good. Rather than fear, he had felt a thrill when participating in the battlefield—the excitement of winning with strategies he had devised. But he didn’t want Mercian to know that; he loved how caring she was.

Mercian, holding Ruan, then looked toward a portrait of a man who strongly resembled him.

“This must be your father, Ruan.”

“Yes, my father—Duke Reinold Canoluf.”

The sharp features of the man mirrored Ruan’s eyes and mouth perfectly.

“You resemble your father a lot. I imagine you’ll look even more like him as you grow.”

“I’m not sure about that, but my aunt did say I took after him a lot.”

“But he only has one portrait? No others?”

“He didn’t like painting. This one was done at my mother’s request.”

“This is wonderful. Seeing Ruan’s childhood like this, I feel like I understand him so much better today.”

As Mercian gazed at the wall full of portraits, a sudden bittersweet feeling arose.

Portraits… Most nobles had portraits of their family and daily activities from a young age. Even the Beanoman was overflowing with paintings of Lucianne, yet Mercian had none.

Seeing Lucianne’s portraits, Mercian had often been told by Penelope:

“It’s not that I don’t want to paint you, Mer. But if your portrait is placed beside beautiful Lucianne, your less attractive face would stand out. Lose some weight first, then we’ll paint it.”

Mercian had impulsively fasted to lose weight. Later, Penelope changed the story:

“Mer, I’m sorry. With our finances these days, having a painter is difficult. When things improve, I’ll have you painted.”

Mercian had believed it all, but later realized it had been an excuse. Her mother and sister simply didn’t want to spend money on her.

It was long ago, but sometimes the memory still stung. 

Even knowing they could no longer harm her…

“Well, shall we go out now? I suddenly feel hungry.”

Mercian tried to brighten her voice, but Ruan grabbed her hand and pulled her back into the room.

“Madam, you haven’t finished exploring yet.”

“Excuse me? Ruan, do you have more family here?”

“Of course not. But one wall is covered, isn’t it?”

Mercian looked at a white cloth covering a section of the wall.

“Oh? You’re right. If not your aunt’s paintings, what could be behind this?”

Ruan smiled and guided Mercian’s hand to lift the cloth.

“…W-what is this?”

Mercian stared at the paintings in stunned silence.

Behind the cloth were portraits of Mercian herself: making sandwiches in Phenomenon Village, rowing a boat with Ruan, dancing with him at the summer festival, watching fireworks, reading on a tree, eating, and many other moments—along with Ruan’s face gazing at her in each scene.

“All these are of me and Ruan? When did you paint all this?”

Seeing the paintings, Mercian felt an overwhelming rush of emotions.

“Do you like my gift?”

“Ruan… sob… I… I…”

“Shh…”

Ruan hugged the tearful Mercian warmly, patting her back.

“Ruan, when did you paint all of this?”

“I realized after you disappeared. For five months, I hadn’t painted a single portrait while searching for you. So I painted you, the image of you in my mind. And I promised myself that once I found you, I would capture your likeness in a painting.”

“Now that I see this…”

Mercian recalled the newspaper Cassel had shown her in Phenomenon Village, the one featuring her portrait.

“Thank you so much, Ruan. This is such an unexpected gift. I love it. It’s amazing to see myself in a painting… and you too…”

“I only just realized it myself. Hanging these paintings here, I see how much I’ve changed since meeting you. It’s amazing and wonderful.”

“Ruan.”

“Look, Madam. As you said, my face before twenty was stern and emotionless. But making sandwiches with you, rowing the boat, dancing—my expressions are full of smiles. A little awkward, but I don’t mind. And I plan to fill this space with more paintings, as we live our lives together forever.”

“Ruan. I feel the same. Seeing myself genuinely happy and laughing—it’s amazing. Not like when I was constantly under Lucianne and my mother’s watch. Let’s live happily and joyfully from now on.”

“Then we should start putting that plan into action right away.”

“Ruan, dinner first.”

“Don’t worry, Madam. Dinner will be ready soon.”

Ruan lifted Mercian effortlessly and walked from the small room into the adjacent couple’s room.

“I love you, Ruan.”

“I love you too. Madam, I love you more than you could imagine.”

Ruan gently kissed Mercian’s lips.