ILTDAMH | CHAPTER 28

Chapter 28

“It was the most thrilling, most intoxicating gift he had ever received since the day he was born.”

She had never thought it was love.

On their wedding day, when they first met, she’d looked at his overly thin frame with surprise, her eyes betraying concern over the opinions of onlookers. 

That had lingered in his mind, prompting him to throw a cloak over her shoulders.

Later, when she—so brazen yet endearing—had asked whether he, in his weakened state, could make it through their wedding night, it had stirred something in him.

At first, she was simply a wife he’d have to spend six months with, and he only hoped they wouldn’t end up on bad terms.

But somewhere along the way, the mere sight of her had his heart pounding for no reason at all. 

If she was out of sight, he missed her.

If he held her, he never wanted to let go.

Whether this feeling was the “love” Cassel, Tablo, and Moses always spoke of, he wasn’t sure. What he did know was that he didn’t dislike it—if fate allowed him to keep living, he wanted to keep her in his arms forever.

Drawing her into his embrace, eyes locked on hers as they widened at his words, he asked,
“So, my lady—if I’m still here three months from now, may I kiss you right now?”

“…No.”

“What?”

Her refusal left me disappointed, but she reached up and tapped my nose with her finger.

“Of course not. Whether you leave in three months or not, our contract is for six months. Even if you stay, I’ll be the one leaving. I’ll go somewhere no one knows me, and live alone in peace. I’ll raise chickens and ducks, grow vegetables, cook delicious meals, and live happily without anyone interfering.”

“Leaving… I see.”

So she wasn’t planning to return to her family’s manor after all.

Watching her, tipsy and candidly revealing her plans for after she left the ducal estate, brought a bitter taste to his mouth.

“Why was she so cold to the viscountess and her daughter? To detach herself? “

Would she do the same to me soon?

No… she thought I’d be dead soon. 

That made things different.

Still, hearing her speak of leaving made something deep in his chest ache.

“But! Since today’s the last day of the year—and your very first and last home party here—I’ll give you a special gift. Come here!”

With a soft, mischievous smile, she looped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips to his.

The moment her soft lips touched his, the sweet scent of wine spilt into his mouth.

“…Ah, my lady—you started this. So you’ll have to take responsibility for everything that follows.”

When she tried to pull away, he cupped the back of her head, easing her down onto the bed as he drank in her breath.

“Mm—Ru… Ruan…”

Her mind spun under the deep, fervent kiss.

Mercian couldn’t think straight beneath the deep, burning kiss I gave her. 

After a long while exploring every corner of her mouth, I looked down at her—silent, wide-eyed in shock—and brushed my fingers tenderly over her face.

“My lady, you won’t remember much of this tomorrow… So let’s stop here. Sleep well.”

And with his voice, gentle and sweet as a lullaby, she drifted into sleep.

The next morning.

“My lady, are you feeling all right?”

At Charles’ voice, she opened her eyes, wincing as a sharp pain pounded through her skull.

“How much did I even drink last night? Charles, my head is killing me.”

“Hohoho. Jang made you a stew that’s good for hangovers—go wash up and come down.”

“Thanks… but where’s Ruan?”

“Of course he’s waiting for you in the dining room.”

“Really? But… how did I get back to my room last night?”

“Didn’t the master carry you?”

“Did he? I thought I told him I could walk on my own…”

From the moment she’d left the dining hall the night before, her memory was blank.

.

.

.

“Did you sleep well, my lady?”

“Not really… I drank too much; my head’s pounding. Are you all right?”

“I don’t get drunk that easily. But your tolerance seems low—why did you drink so much?”

“Well… it was my first time drinking. The wine was so good I just kept going… I guess I overdid it. But… how exactly did I get to my room last night? I can’t remember a thing. I could’ve sworn I walked.”

“Oh? You don’t remember anything?”

At Ruan’s words, Mercian pressed a hand to her forehead, thinking for a moment before shaking her head.

“I’m sorry. I really don’t remember. The only thing I recall is you asking me if I’d drunk an entire bottle of wine… I didn’t… make any mistakes, did I?”

So, she doesn’t remember kissing me after all.

Then she must not remember that we kissed each other.

The faint hope Ruan had been holding onto dissolved into the inevitable, and his face betrayed a trace of disappointment.

“Well… I wouldn’t exactly call it a mistake. You gave me a wonderful gift.”

A gift? 

When did I prepare a gift?

“A gift? From me? What kind of gift?”

Watching Mercian’s utterly baffled expression, Ruan’s lips curved into a mischievous smile.

“That’s a secret. The gift you gave me yesterday was… a secret gift. If you happen to remember it later, then I’ll tell you.”

What… Is he trying to play word games with me now?

Mercian tilted her head at the strange smile on his face.

“It’s not the kind of gift that offends you, is it?”

“Offend me? My dear, it was the most thrilling and blissful gift I have ever received in my life. Truly, truly a gift I adore.”

Th… thrilling and blissful? 

And he liked it? 

What on earth could it be?

The more Ruan spoke, the less Mercian could guess at what this so-called gift might be—but with her head pounding, she didn’t care to think any further.

Well, as long as it wasn’t something unpleasant, that’s good enough.

Throughout the meal, Ruan kept smiling to himself, and though curiosity prickled at her, Mercian decided to wait for her memories to return on their own.

***

Imperial Year 518.

The dawn of a new year.

Two weeks into the year, word spread that Prince Harmon had safely arrived in the Kingdom of Allemond, completed his wedding ceremony, and was returning to the Empire with the princess. 

The Imperial family bustled with preparations to welcome its new member.

At the same time, strange rumours began to circulate in the capital.

“What nonsense is this? You’re telling me that restless spirits, wronged in life, are wandering my lands? And you’ve come into this sacred council chamber to accuse me of some petty gossip?”

Duke Kaimon Craft, father of the Empress, spoke with a scowl. 

At this, Count Raymond Forest—who had never cared much for Kaimon—leaned forward.

“Petty gossip? Duke, several people have already claimed to see the weeping ghost of a woman in your territory, in the village of Markine, crying mournfully in the night. The strange thing is, it always happens near the village entrance, and each witness describes a different woman. Can you truly say all of that is a lie?”

“What are you implying, Raymond? That I murdered women and buried them in secret or something?”

“Of course not, Your Grace. But I am saying that these rumours are spreading in your domain.”

“Now that you mention it,” another voice chimed in, “I’ve heard an odd rumour myself. Lately, women living alone on the outskirts of the capital have been disappearing. They say a wealthy young gentleman has been taking women away to spend the night with him. Some return… but others never do. Perhaps… those women—”

“What utter nonsense—”

“Nonsense!”

Kaimon exploded in anger, insisting he had nothing to do with it. 

But unlike the duke, Diamond’s expression darkened Silen’s words.

What? 

Is that rumour really going around?

Surely they don’t think it’s me…?

No—best to steer their attention elsewhere. 

I’ll have them dig up the duke’s lands instead.

Survival first, explanations later.

“Then perhaps we should dig up that village,” Damon said.

“Y–Your Highness, the Crown Prince, are you saying you suspect me as well?”

The mad fool—if only he knew what’s actually buried there…

Kaimon, looking at Diamond, who remained blissfully ignorant, had to resist the urge to storm across the room and grab him by the collar. 

Instead, he forced himself to speak through clenched teeth.

“Your Highness, I am a man without a single stain on my honour. Of course, I could order the ground dug up this instant to prove my innocence. But if word spreads that the Imperial family saw fit to dig into my duchy based on gossip from mere commoners, I fear it would diminish the dignity of the Crown in the eyes of the Empire’s people.”

“And what exactly do you mean by that, Duke?” Diamond shot back. “What does some wandering female spirit in your lands have to do with the dignity of the Imperial family?”

It has nothing to do with the Imperial family—But it has everything to do with you, Diamond, you bastard.

Kaimon bit back the urge to silence Diamond’s oblivious mouth for good, forcing a strained smile instead.

“Ah… No, that’s not what I meant—”

Before he could finish, Viseluke turned to Damon.

“Crown Prince, how would you have this matter handled? Do you agree with the duke that we should let it go? Or do you believe we should investigate the truth behind these rumours?”

Ah… is this another test?

Trying to teach me, once again, that even relatives mustn’t be shown favouritism when governing?

Hmph. 

Whatever they find buried on the duke’s land, what’s that got to do with me?

Diamond was beginning to grow bored with the endlessly drawn-out meeting.

“Your Majesty, I believe we must inspect the duchy. Rumour or not, if whispers from such a distant province have reached the capital, there must be something there. Don’t you agree, Lord Kaimon? If you have nothing to hide, there’s no reason to oppose digging up your lands.”

“Do as you please. I have nothing to fear.”

The moment the thought struck him—I needed to move the body before they found it—Kaimon shot to his feet, intent on leaving the chamber at once. 

But Biseluk’s voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Duke!”

“Yes, Your Majesty?”

“I trust you.”

“…Pardon?”

“Which is why you’ll remain here while the inspection is carried out. If you vanish from the capital, tongues will wag—that you took the opportunity to move whatever it is you didn’t want found.”

The slippery old fox…

Kaimon looked at Biseluk’s benevolent smile, unable to utter a word.

His fists clenched and unclenched helplessly at his sides.

***

A few days later, the Empire was shaken to its core.

In the village of Markaine, part of Kaimon Craft’s domain, over twenty unidentified female corpses were discovered.

Every single one of them had been beaten to death with horrific brutality.

Kaimon swore it had nothing to do with him.

But the site was close to the ducal estate, and witnesses claimed they’d seen the duke’s men visiting the area every few days.

“Kaimon, I don’t believe you are capable of such acts. But the public attitude is… unfavourable. I will do my utmost to prove your innocence. Until then, you are to remain quietly at your estate.”

“Y–Your Majesty… I…”

Kaimon could not bring himself to reveal that all those bodies were the Crown Prince’s doing. 

He was ultimately forced to follow the Biseluk order.