Chapter 21
◆Side: Julius◆
“Hey—Julius! Where the hell are you going—?!”
Leaving Marc’s voice behind me, I ran at full speed, enchanting my horse with magic as I went.
We had been on our way to the royal castle of the neighboring kingdom for routine patrol duties when a sudden report reached us: War has broken out in the neighboring country.
The moment I heard it, it felt like time stopped. The shock was so great that I could hardly breathe.
(This doesn’t make sense… I thought there were still at least six more months before the war started. Why now—?)
Armed with the knowledge from my first life, I had intended to be fully prepared this time. I had even suggested multiple times—despite no official request—that we should bolster defenses near the neighboring kingdom. I had been careful. Overly careful. And yet, reality had veered from my expectations.
But puzzling over why things had changed didn’t matter now.
(I must hurry… to the Pettigrew estate…!)
The royal castle wouldn’t be the first target of war. It would be the Pettigrew family’s lands.
I knew—because Natalie’s family… she herself had been the war’s first victim.
Even if this second life was unfolding differently than the first, there was no way the Pettigrew territory—so close to the enemy nation—would remain untouched by war. I urged my long‑time companion horse onward, reinforcing its body with layers of magic.
I had vast magical power, yes—but it could only act upon physical objects. Not once in either life had I been able to use teleportation magic. Never had I resented that fact more than now.
From here to the Pettigrew lands was half a day’s journey. On the knights’ best horses, perhaps only several hours. But I needed to get there in minutes. Seconds. Or I would regret it forever.
I focused solely on running. The air pressure alone from my speed was enough to flatten the surrounding grass and trees.
◆◇◆
Come to think of it… it was from the day I first met Natalie that I began to feel this second life might not follow the same path as the first.
Up until then, I had merely retraced the days of the Fangray household, enduring the rampages of my unstable magic.
My guiding principle had always been the same— to protect Natalie during the war. And beyond that, to protect her happiness. For her sake, I drove myself to train even harder than before.
“—So anyway, I had this fateful encounter at the tavern! She was such a beauty, and we already—”
“…Wait. That’s…”
I had become captain of the knight order again, patrolling the remote regions. Marc’s endless boasting about his women barely registered in my ears—because my eyes had locked on something impossible.
A carriage bearing the crest of the Pettigrew family—engraved with a rabbit motif.
In my memory, it had never been here. And worse, the carriage was heading straight into a dangerous forested road known for bandits.
“—And do you know what she said back to me—hey, Julius?! Where are you going now?!”
Leaving Marc babbling behind, I spurred my horse after the carriage. Sure enough, it was indeed the Pettigrew crest. And as I feared, bandits surrounded it.
I leapt in without hesitation, cutting down their weapons with a single swing and scattering them unconscious. I halted the carriage door just before it opened into danger, protecting whoever was inside.
Though I could have handled it alone, my knights soon caught up and helped subdue the rest.
“Geez, Julius… If you’re going to rush off, at least say something to me first—”
“…My apologies.”
Sensing Marc’s nagging would be endless, I cut it short with a swift apology. That was typical of us. But more pressing was checking who was inside the carriage.
And then, I met a pair of eyes as clear as amethyst.
(Natalie… it’s you.)
I tried to keep my composure, but inwardly my thoughts were in chaos. Why was she here? I had no idea.
But then I noticed her hands trembling. Her eyes—when they looked at me—were filled with fear. Perhaps she was shaken by the bandit attack…
And yet, the sight of her frightened gaze stabbed through me, tearing at my chest.
(…I don’t even have the right to feel this way.)
I was the one who had caused her suffering in the first life. I had no right to regret her fear, no right to wish it away. Even if this Natalie remembered nothing of before.
Still… I wanted to erase her fear.
So I removed my cloak and draped it over the carriage, shielding her from unpleasant sights. I just wanted her clear, unclouded eyes—and her heart—to remain safe.
Marc looked stunned by my behavior, but I ignored him. Instead, I ordered the knights to escort her carriage home.
(If a monster like me followed, it would only terrify her further…)
I tightened my grip on the reins and forced down my emotions. Sadness, regret, despair—it was all rust from the blade of my own making.
And so I remained, watching until her carriage disappeared safely from sight.
◆◇◆
It was afterward that Marc started prattling again.
“Heeey, Captain Julius~! So you do have that side to you after all, huh?”
“…What side?”
“Oh, come on, you know. She was a real beauty, that lady. Maybe you could, y’know, introduce me—”
“…”
“Ahh, I’m joking! Just kidding! Put that hand away from your sword, please!”
He had escorted Natalie back to her mansion properly, at least. But after that, Marc became unbearably meddlesome.
Perhaps entrusting her protection to my vice‑captain had been a mistake. He fancied himself an expert in love, of all things.
“You know, Julius, maybe the problem is your black clothes. A little… off‑putting, yeah?”
“…What? Is that true?”
“Of course! A gloomy color like that? The lady must’ve been disappointed!”
I had no clue about romance. I barely understood women at all. And so—foolishly—I let Marc’s words sway me.
“Fufufu! As a man who has mastered the path of love countless times, allow me to guide you.”
“…Fine.”
“Eh? What was that? Louder, Julius.”
“…Damn it. Please… help me.”
I just wanted to make Natalie smile. Never again did I want to make her cry. And so I blindly accepted Marc’s idiotic advice.
◆◇◆
Some time later, the kingdom buzzed with talk of the neighboring country’s royal ball.
Would the handsome prince make an appearance? Who would be the next king? Gossip filled the salons.
Marc was especially excited. As allies, our kingdom had received invitations as well. Tradition dictated that the knight captain and vice‑captain attend. As a duke, I also had to bring family.
(…Mother.)
Just thinking of my mother gave me a headache. In this life too, she remained warped—addicted to wine and drugs. I had hoped to reconcile with her somehow, but that dream was far‑fetched.
“Hey, Julius. Did you send her a dress?”
“…A dress?”
“Yes! For Lady Natalie, of course.”
Her name made my heart jolt.
Marc looked at me as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
“A dress gift is natural! And listen—if it matches your eye color, it shows your sincerity! Red, Julius. A red dress!”
In the end, I gave in again. I purchased a crimson gown, decorated with countless rubies. Even if she didn’t wear it, at least the gems could be of use. I couldn’t bring myself to sign it with my name—only a small card.
And so, the dress was delivered to the Pettigrew estate.
◆◇◆
—On the day of the ball.
I entered with Marc and my mother. Both were already in high spirits, which worried me.
“Haah…”
The gaze of the nobles, as though I were some spectacle, was suffocating. I quickly introduced my mother to a talkative noble to keep her occupied for the night. With that duty done, I retreated to the wall.
It was all the same as before. The same hall, the same games of intrigue.
But then—the music stopped. The doors opened. And she appeared.
Natalie.
Words like “angelic” were ones I had never used in my life—but they came unbidden.
Her clear skin, her graceful steps, her hair and eyes shining beneath the chandelier’s glow… she looked unearthly.
And then—her gaze met mine.
“…!”
My heart pounded painfully. It felt like she could see right through me.
But soon her eyes filled with confusion.
(…Why?)
Then I noticed her dress. Not the one I had sent.
Only then did I realize—sending her a dress out of nowhere had been inappropriate.
(…Marc.)
He must have sensed my wrath, because he slipped quickly toward the doors. I chased after him, determined to demand answers.
◆◇◆
Because of that chase, I was late. By the time I returned, my mother was attacking her.
I arrived just in time to see shards of glass, flung by magic, flying at Natalie.
I didn’t think. I moved. I caught the glass with my bare hand.
Pain seared as skin tore open. But relief washed over me—Natalie wasn’t hurt.
My mother, oblivious to the gravity of her crime, stood there dazed. I felt both pity for her broken state and fury for what she had done.
(…So this was the turning point, even now.)
I knew then—she could no longer be controlled.
I would use this chance to send her far away. Tonight would mark her punishment and exile.
I instructed Marc and then left the hall. My blood wouldn’t stop flowing. I couldn’t risk being seen by a physician here. So I went to the gardens—the quiet place nobles used to escape the noise of the ballroom.
◆◇◆
I never expected Natalie to follow me there.
Awkward and unsure, I wondered—did I scare her? Displease her? Why had she come?
But instead of disgust, she showed concern.
Even though blood was an ugly sight, she tended to me with kindness.
(…Why didn’t I notice this about her before?)
Her healing magic not only closed the wound but soothed the raging storm of my unstable mana. It reminded me of nights in our past life, when she healed me in my sleep, and my dreams were peaceful.
I wrapped her injured foot with cloth without thinking, lifting her gently. My heart pounded—not from love, I told myself, but from nervousness.
And so I left quickly, retreating before I could impose more on her.
(…She really is incredible.)
But I knew—this healing would not last forever. Someday soon, either death or magical collapse would claim me.
Until then, I vowed—while I still had strength—I would protect her.
◆◇◆
After the ball, I wasted no time.
I arranged for my mother’s exile, sending her far away to another land, neither our ally nor our enemy. She fought, screamed, resisted—but I ignored it.
Months later, the ducal physician Franz visited me. His diagnosis was the same: my magical collapse hadn’t slowed.
But in casual talk, he suddenly said:
“Oh! By the way, Duke Julius—do you know Lady Natalie Pettigrew?”
“…Y-yes.”
My heart nearly stopped.
“She’s remarkably knowledgeable in herbs, and so very kind! Thanks to her, we’ve found a medicine for the Black Spot disease. Her mother has hope of recovery now.”
“…I see. That is wonderful news.”
And it truly was. At last, I understood why Natalie had been in that remote area that day—perhaps she had gone to visit Franz.
But a strange feeling lingered. Had they known each other before?
I pushed the doubt aside as Franz began talking about the war.
(…Strange. Isn’t it too soon for war to be discussed?)
Even so, I forced my body through the growing instability of my mana, preparing as best I could.
And when the war began suddenly—far sooner than expected—I could no longer stay still.
◆◇◆
Racing my horse, I finally reached the Pettigrew lands.
And there—at the road leading to the enemy’s country—I saw her.
Natalie, sitting on the ground, staring ahead.
And in the distance she gazed toward—was the very scene I had once seen only in paintings of her fate—
