{ Chapter 40 }
Still, the cake Idette brought was really delicious.
 Honestly, I felt awkward joining in the conversation between Peril and IdetteâI was kind of interrupting their private talk. So, I just focused on eating cake.
âYou were reckless to go to Dians on your own,â Peril said.
âI had no choice. You know why I came to the capitalâŚâ
Idetteâs face turned red. I looked at her instinctively, and she tried to cool her cheeks, clearly embarrassed.
âI came because I wanted to experience more things.â
âYes, you can definitely have more experiences in the capital than in the countryside,â I replied.
She nodded eagerly.
âExactly! If I get more experiences, Iâll meet new people and maybeâŚâ
She whispered shyly, face fully red, ââŚmaybe even fall in love.â
Thatâs so romantic.
Clenching her fists, she exclaimed, âThatâs why I went to Dians! Love is all about timing! I wanted to go on a date with Lord Erkishian, but I didnât think it would turn into such a big dealâŚâ
âŚIt felt like I really shouldnât act like I knew anything about this.
Still, if someone was targeting Idette, the reason would definitely be her bloodline.
In the original story, there were people who feared her power.
âBut now, Ailins is a forgotten great magician.â
Someone had intentionally erased the name of Ailins from history.
And now that Idette had shown up, they probably didnât want the name to reappear.
Peril ran a tired hand down his face.
âSigh⌠I canât believe the one who woke me up turned out like this.â
âI didnât wake you up on purpose, okay?â
âŚWait, was I even supposed to be listening to this conversation?
I mean, I already knew most of it from the original story, but still.
They were both being way too careless.
Afraid Iâd get dragged into something, I just kept eating cake.
Seeing that, Idette smiled proudly and even brought me more slices.
Peril poured tea into my empty cup.
All this attention was starting to feel a little overwhelming.
âUm⌠Iâm fine, really. Please continue your conversation.â
âHmm⌠I donât know. I just feel like we shouldnât leave you alone,â Idette said.
Idette, shouldnât you be the one saying that to yourself?
âI agree,â Peril added. âYou almost died jumping into save someone.â
He sighed deeply.
Ugh, come on! I did my best, you know?
* * *
âŞYouâll be coming to the ball, right? Iâll be looking forward to it so much. Iâm seriously counting down the days.âŤ
 Idette repeated that line over and over before leaving, like she was trying to brainwash me.
I let out a deep breath and leaned back in the chair.
All I did was eat in Perilâs shop, but it wasnât a bad visit.
âYou said you sent your students to Dremokhan before, right?â
âI did.â
âHow did they cross the wall?â
Peril frowned. But he turned to me with a look that said he understood why I was asking.
âForget it. Thereâs no way you can use that method.â
âSo itâs something only mages can do?â
He didnât answer, but that silence said âyes.â
âLast time you asked about memories, and now you want to know how to get past the wallâŚâ
Peril tilted his head, suspicious.
âYou⌠something happened to you in Dremokhan, didnât it?â
Whew. His intuition was scary sharp.
Well, I was being pretty obvious.
âI just felt a strong sense of familiarity when I was there. It made me wonder if I had forgotten something.â
 âŚI didnât mention meeting Ailins.
Deep inside, I felt like someone was shouting at me.
It was just a gut feelingâbut too strong to ignore. And I had a feeling I shouldnât tell Peril about it.
Maybe he was thinking over what Iâd said, because after a moment of silence, Peril spoke.
âI thought the World Tree had completely rotted.â
ââŚâŚâ
âBut after seeing the root you brought⌠it didnât seem that way.â
Come to think of it⌠the moment I touched the World Tree, it had started to sprout a leaf.
I still had no idea how that even worked.
âIf I tell you how to get into Dremokhan, what will you give me in return?â
I clenched my fists at his words.
âIâll get you whatever you want. But first⌠I have a question.â
âGo ahead.â
âIs this really about finding a cure for the Dremokan disease?â
He had hesitated earlier when I asked. It was still suspicious.
âNo one has found any clues about Dremokan for a long time. Itâs not like a solution would suddenly appear, right?â
âYouâre right. But the way I see it⌠it feels like youâre just using how desperate I am to satisfy your own curiosity.â
âLet me ask you something. Why are you so desperate to save him?â
Was he trying to tease me?
But his eyes were serious. There wasnât even a trace of a smile.
âYou said it was your grandfather. But even if he gets better⌠he doesnât have much time left anyway, does he?â
âŚThat was a bold thing to say.
But oddly enough, it didnât make me angry. I just felt⌠curious.
âItâs a waste of time,â he added, playing with a strand of my hair. He was waiting for an answer.
It was something Iâd never really thought about before. So it took me a moment to reply.
âI want my grandfather to pass peacefully. Not in pain.â
âHe could still die anytime. Even if heâs cured, he might die in a carriage accident, or catch another disease.â
âThatâs a useless assumption. Right now, heâs sufferingâand I donât want to see that.â
I looked at Peril straight in the eye.
âYou probably donât understand someone like me, with your endless lifespan.â
âHaha!â
Suddenly, Peril burst into laughter.
Honestly, I thought Iâd crossed the line a few times in this conversation.
But instead of getting angry, he laughed.
âSomeone once asked me what I hoped to gain by choosing immortality.â
ââŚâ
âWhy donât you try answering that? What do you think I wanted from immortality?â
âŚHow would I know?
He didnât look like he even knew the answer.
He chuckled softly and threw an arm over my shoulders.
I flinched hard, and he pulled me closer with a mischievous grin.
âYou seem like someone whoâd know.â
ââŚIf I answer wrong, are you going to disappear and never see me again?â
âDonât worry. I like bold people.â
If you like me so much, why do you always look at me like that?
Peril hadnât scared me in a while, and I mustâve gotten too relaxed.
How could I have spoken so casually to someone like him?
With a heavy sigh, I gave my answer.
âYou were probably afraid of dying.â
Never aging, never dying âIt was definitely tempting. But to me right now, it didnât seem all that appealing.
Maybe Iâd only change my mind if I ever came face-to-face with death myself.
ââŚMaybe youâre right.â
Peril muttered quietly.
âŚWait, did he forget his own reason for choosing immortality?
Seeing him like this⌠I felt a little sorry for him.
After hesitating, I said carefully, âAbout earlier⌠Iâm sorry. I know youâve been thinking hard about the disease. I wasnât trying to pressure you.â
Looking back, everything Peril had shown me was out of kindness.
What he wanted⌠was for his immortality to end.
That alone was probably enough to fill his mind with conflict.
And here I was, bothering him with my own problems.
âŚUgh. Now that I think about it, I was being a huge burden.
âI-I donât know if Iâll be of any real help⌠but if thereâs something you want, Iâll do my best to help.â
Perilâs eyes slowly widened. Then he let out a small laugh.
âOh, you have no idea what youâre offering. If you knew, youâd faint.â
âI do know. You want help dying, donât you?â
Even so, Peril looked genuinely happy.
Why does he wish for his own death so badly?







For added bittersweet drama for the story, of course
Maybe think a little before saying anything