34. To the One Who Waits for Me
The walk, which only gave me more to think about, wasn’t long.
We had arrived in the village after sunset to begin with, and Leofric, who had been silently following me the entire time, also weighed on my mind.
He had said he wouldn’t speak a word and only provide escort if I was uncomfortable—and true to his word, he hadn’t. That in itself bothered me.
Part of me wished he would just go in and sleep first, but I knew even if I told him to go ahead, he wouldn’t budge.
“Let’s go back now, Lord Leo.”
In the end, I turned to him and suggested we return.
We walked back in a line, the three of us side by side.
I was slightly concerned about what I should say to him, but thankfully, we had Betty between us.
Betty, who could talk to anyone and knew how to keep the mood light.
On our short walk back, she chatted away to Leofric—praising the knights’ riding skills, asking about tomorrow’s route, and sharing how wonderful the trip had been.
Leofric replied in his usual calm voice and even chuckled lightly here and there, humoring her.
The atmosphere was warm and peaceful.
So much so that it almost felt out of place, considering we had a long journey ahead again tomorrow.
“So then, I—Mer?”
If I hadn’t noticed something.
If I hadn’t stopped walking.
That calm atmosphere might have lasted until we got back to the inn.
And if it had, sharing a bed with Leofric tonight might have been easier to bear.
But of course, things were never that simple.
Not when such a dangerous variable was standing right there.
“……”
We might have passed each other without noticing.
We were just far enough apart that if we hadn’t made eye contact, we could’ve kept walking without realizing.
Or even if one of us had seen the other and simply looked away, pretending not to notice, nothing would’ve happened.
But unfortunately, our eyes met—and we both stopped in our tracks.
“……”
“……”
Betty and Leofric, who had gone a few steps ahead, turned around. Their gazes followed mine.
And then—
All four of our eyes met in the air.
If I had to pick the most suffocating moment of this trip, I wouldn’t hesitate to choose this one.
Betty looked flustered. Lloyd’s face was unreadable. Leofric had completely frozen.
I silently prayed for the moment to pass quickly.
A few seconds ticked by where no one said or did anything.
It felt like several minutes instead of mere seconds.
Surprisingly, Leofric was the first to move.
He lightly waved at Lloyd, who was standing a bit farther away, and then held out his hand to me, still as stiff as a statue.
“Let’s go back. It’s late.”
To anyone watching, he looked like a courteous escort attending to someone precious—but his expression remained stone-cold.
The hand he extended seemed to say:
You and Lloyd should have no further connection. Give up and come to me.
The path we walk is not the one Lloyd is taking.
The moment I looked at his hand, I could feel Lloyd’s gaze piercing into me.
And I could tell what message that gaze was trying to send.
“Lady Mer.”
Betty called my name in a nervous voice when I just stood there without taking Leofric’s hand.
Her eyes said it all: Didn’t you agree to stop seeing him?
What’s there to hesitate about?
Now that I was married to Leofric, Lloyd was nothing more than a cousin. A relationship that couldn’t—and shouldn’t—become anything else.
To avoid suspicion from Leofric, the right thing to do was to turn away from Lloyd.
But Lloyd’s expression lingered in my mind.
Something felt off. Unsettlingly so.
Part of me even wondered if Leofric had arranged for him to be here to test me.
“…Did you arrange to meet him here today?”
I asked cautiously, trying to read Leofric’s expression.
I tried to make my question sound light, but he didn’t answer.
Only a wounded expression crossed his face.
It didn’t look like he had set this up.
I looked at him quietly and added,
“I didn’t ask him to come, Your Highness.”
His expression softened slightly at my words, a faint smile tugging at his lips.
“I know, Mer. I know you’re not that kind of person.”
“I never told him to meet me here.”
“Yes, I believe you.”
I spoke each word firmly, trying to reassure him.
In that brief moment—Lloyd in front of me, Leofric beside me—I put a temporary pause on my internal conflicts.
Whether Lloyd turned back time to take revenge on me or not, the important thing was that this second chance was also an opportunity for me.
So even if Leofric had come for revenge, I needed to be ready to offer him a chance too.
And to do that—I would take his hand.
“There won’t be any more meetings without Your Highness.”
“If you say so, then I believe you.”
“…And what you’re worried about—won’t happen either.”
“I have no worries when it comes to you.”
Leofric, still smiling faintly, answered all my words with care, his smile gradually deepening.
He kept repeating that he trusted me, that he had no doubts—and I should’ve taken his hand to affirm that trust.
But instead, I said,
“So please understand the choice I’m making now, Your Highness.”
I bowed respectfully and took a step back.
My instincts—my gut—were telling me:
The one I needed to go to now wasn’t Leofric.
It was Lloyd.
There was something I had to ask and confirm.
And to do that, I needed Leofric’s understanding.
“It’ll only take a moment. If you want, you can stay and watch what I do. But right now… I don’t think I can take your hand and walk away.”
I turned my gaze toward Lloyd, who still stood there.
He looked as if he’d expected me to come to him.
Or maybe he still believed Amelia Vermerian—madly in love—would never turn her back on him.
All the more reason I had to go.
“It won’t take long. And again, if you want, you can stay and see for yourself.”
Silence fell.
Even though I’d finished speaking, Leofric stayed frozen, hand still extended.
Betty looked between us, stunned.
She clearly hadn’t expected me to choose Lloyd over Leofric.
I didn’t blame her.
I looked at Leofric’s unmoving form for a moment—then slowly turned away.
I wasn’t asking for his understanding or permission.
I was simply paving the cleanest, safest way to speak with Lloyd.
Because Leofric was, after all, my husband.
As I turned to go, it was Leofric’s soft voice that stopped me.
“I’ll wait here.”
“……”
“It’s not because I don’t trust you. It’s just… it makes me feel at ease.”
Leofric spoke gently, giving me his blessing.
He’d wait here, not because he doubted me, but because it made him feel better.
I turned back to smile at him.
“I’ll be right back.”
“Yes. I’ll be here.”
He even gave me a faint smile.
I turned my back on him and walked quickly toward Lloyd.
I could feel Leofric’s gaze behind me.
A strange sense of responsibility welled up in me—as though I needed to finish quickly and return.
But Lloyd seemed to think differently.
As I drew closer, a smile crept across his face—one he couldn’t hide.
As if everything was finally going his way, because I was coming to him, leaving my husband behind.
Even though before the trip, he’d said he would leave everything to my choice…
Even though he’d said there was no future for us.
With each step I took, I clenched my trembling fists.
Unfortunately for him, I had no intention of doing what he wanted.
I just needed confirmation for my theory.
“I didn’t expect to see you here, Amelia. Are you heading back to the capital?”
“Funny. I was about to ask you the same. Why are you here, when you should be in the capital?”
The moment he saw me, Lloyd’s face lit up.
That same expression I’d seen whenever I brought him good news or fulfilled his wishes.
Now that time had reversed, I could see it so clearly.
Why hadn’t I noticed it before?
I didn’t answer and asked another question instead. He seemed a bit flustered.
He was probably thrown off by how I was no longer acting like the Amelia who always listened quietly.
Rather than giving him time to respond, I continued:
“Didn’t you return to the capital the day we met? Have you been following me all the way here since then?”
“No… Amelia, I really did go back that day.”
“Waynes is not close to the capital. Yet you’re here, in a village on the road from Waynes to the capital. And I’m supposed to believe that?”
“I don’t know how to explain it, but I really did return. There are people who can confirm I was there.”
“And then?”
“…I opened my eyes, and I was in Waynes. Just like that.”
Lloyd mumbled, looking dazed.
He insisted repeatedly that he had returned to the capital.
That he had been despairing—and then suddenly, like being struck by lightning, he’d woken up in Waynes.
“I know it sounds crazy. I probably sound insane. But I swear, there’s no other explanation.”
“And now, you’re on your way back?”
“…Yeah.”
Even as he spoke, Lloyd looked uncertain.
He was being honest, but my calm reaction seemed to unsettle him even more.
Regardless of what he felt, I had the answers I needed.
“I see. Please return safely. And if possible, I’d rather not run into you again on this trip.”
I turned to leave.
And I would have, had he not grabbed my wrist in surprise.
“That’s it? That’s really it?”
He couldn’t believe I came just to ask that.
Otherwise, he wouldn’t have grabbed me with such disbelief.
“Let go.”
But unfortunately, that was all I came for.
And now, it was time to return.
I shook off his hand firmly—and walked away, without a shred of hesitation.
Back to the one who was waiting for me.
