IALFMFL CH 02

Remembering my past life did not change my identity.

I was still Katrina Ezelot. I still hated paprika whenever it appeared on my plate, and I was still afraid of falling asleep alone late at night.

During my etiquette and general education lessons, the last pages of my books still ended up covered in doodles. The attitude of my tutor toward me remained the same, as did that of the maid who entered my room to help me bathe. Both treated me as though they were dealing with a wildcat.

If anything had changed, it was that my behavior, which had previously been nothing more than childish, had become slightly more mature.

Had I finally developed some semblance of decent character?

Even when I looked at the maid standing awkwardly beside the sofa, I felt no violent urge bubbling up inside me, nor did my tongue itch to snap at her.

It was a change that made me painfully realize just how much I had lived like an untamed foal until now.

Simply because I had become quieter, everyday life at the Count’s castle had become remarkably peaceful.

The servants’ expressions had changed as well. Most of them said that even the atmosphere around my room, which had always felt like walking through a bed of thorns, had become as refined and pleasant as the scent of magnolias.

However, not everyone in the castle reacted that way.

In particular, my brothers, who lived under the same roof like complete strangers, became four times noisier than usual, as though they had finally found something to tease me about.

“Kate, did you finally eat something strange?”

“Rick, watch what you say in front of Mother.”

At Edden’s sharp reprimand, the lips of the irritating Rick Ezelot clamped shut.

Hmph. He’s been picking on me since yesterday. Serves him right.

Making sure Edden wasn’t looking, I secretly stuck my tongue out at Rick.

What are you going to do if you glare at me like that?

I stuck my tongue out at him once more.

“Kate.”

Edden, who apparently had eyes in the back of his head, scolded me in a stern voice.

Perhaps because he felt responsible as the eldest son, Edden always became stricter than usual whenever Father was away from the castle.

If this had been me two days ago, I would have shouted,

“Why are you always ordering me around? You’re not even my father, so don’t tell me what to do!”

But I was now the newly reborn New Katrina, so I no longer had any reason to continue acting like an empty-headed girl who feared nothing.

With that in mind, I gave Edden a sweet smile befitting a young lady of a prestigious and ancient count’s family.

“I’m sorry, Brother. Rick kept teasing me, so that’s why. I’ll just eat quietly from now on.”

As soon as I finished speaking, I gently sliced a piece of veal steak and put it into my mouth.

Maybe it was just my imagination, but Edden’s expression, which I caught for a moment, seemed just as displeased as Rick’s had been right before he was about to complain.

For several minutes, the only sound at the table was the clinking of silverware.

By the time I had continued eating with such perfect etiquette that even my tutor would have been moved to tears, a small sigh came from the seat directly across from me.

I knew whose voice it was without even raising my head.

It was my second brother, Rockhard Ezelot.

“Hey, tomboy. What on earth happened to you? My throat is getting blocked because of you, and I can’t even swallow my meat. Did you decide to break off the engagement because Nezar isn’t behaving like a proper human being?”

“Exactly. That’s what I’ve been wanting to say.”

As soon as Rockhard spoke, Rick chimed in as though he’d been waiting for the opportunity.

“You have no idea how painful it is to watch you walking down the hallway with those delicate little steps. Did you fall out of bed and hit your head on the day Nezar came to visit? Because of you, I spent the entire night wondering what I could possibly have done wrong.”

As he continued listing his grievances, I calmly wiped my mouth with the napkin resting on my lap.

“Why is everyone acting like this? Would it make you feel better if I stabbed the back of your hand with my fork and told you to be quiet like I used to?”

“So you do realize that you’re different from before. I thought some doppelgänger who looked exactly like you had snuck into the castle and was pretending to be Katrina Ezelot.”

This was why a person’s usual image was so important.

Just because I didn’t shout during meals and quietly used my knife and fork, I had been forced to hear the same comments for two whole days.

Feeling frustrated, I gulped down the water prepared on the table.

“Yeah, that’s definitely Kate. She has to drink water like an animal.”

I glared at Rick as he nodded in satisfaction after watching me drink comfortably.

“Are you going to keep getting on my nerves? Do you want me to spit it right in your face like an animal?”

Instead of retaliating against my warning, Rick simply smiled in relief, as though a burden had been lifted from his shoulders.

If I said one more harsh word, he looked like he might even reach across the table and ruffle my hair.

“I told you not to smile in front of me while I’m eating, didn’t I? Just looking at your smiling face makes my stomach turn.”

“Good. That’s it, Kate. That’s the real you! You’d better give up pretending to be some refined young lady before Father has a fit.”

I swallowed another mouthful of water to calm my boiling temper.

It had only been two days since I decided to become a proper human being.

For the sake of my pride, I didn’t want to return to my old ways after only two days.

Of course, there was a difference between the servants being completely flustered by the kindness I showed them and my blood-related enemies deliberately provoking me right in front of my face.

The former made me feel proud and satisfied.

The latter made my blood boil for absolutely no reason.

How could Rick manage to make someone angry simply by opening his mouth?

Even after regaining the memories of my past life, my patience with my brothers seemed to remain at rock bottom.

“Enough.”

At that moment, Mother, who had been quietly listening to our conversation, placed her fork down.

“Rick. And Rockhard.”

“Yes.”

“Yes.”

Rick answered in a timid voice as he watched Mother’s expression carefully.

Unlike him, Rockhard was barely suppressing a smile, the corners of his lips twitching.

“Whatever the reason may be, if Kate has finally decided to become a proper lady, even if it’s rather late, shouldn’t you two help her as her older brothers? Yet from where I’m sitting, all I see is the two of you laughing at and teasing Kate for her behavior. Am I wrong?”

“No, Mother.”

“If you’re not, then does that mean I’m right?”

I could hear Rick swallow from where I sat.

Serves him right.

Pretending to cough, I covered the corners of my mouth with my napkin to hide the smile threatening to break through.

“Ah, no, Mother.”

“You two are not to come near Kate for the time being. Especially you, Rick! If you keep provoking Kate, you’ll have to answer to me.”

After finishing in a firm voice, Mother immediately turned her attention toward me and smiled gently.

It was such a kind expression that I had never seen on her face during my entire fifteen years of life.

“So, Kate, don’t worry and work hard on learning proper etiquette. I’ve already spoken to your tutor and arranged for your lessons to be increased by three hours every week. If you get good marks on your next examination, I’ll buy you anything you want.”

My heart cheered at her words.

Having my lesson time increased by three hours was tragic enough to make me want to beat my chest in despair, but the promise that she would buy me anything I wanted made me feel like I could fly.

However, that happiness lasted only a moment.

I belatedly realized that what I needed wasn’t something my mother could buy me.

In fact, my room was already overflowing with luxurious things such as lavish lace dresses with hems that dragged along the floor and jewel necklaces with gems as large as frog’s eyes.

In the past, the heavier my neck and ears felt from wearing jewelry, the more satisfied and confident I had become.

But perhaps because I had remembered my past life, things were different now that I could look at myself objectively.

It was rather sad to admit it myself, but…

What I wanted was something my mother couldn’t give me as a present.

“Daisy, why don’t I have any friends?”

“…Pardon?”

After lunch, Daisy, the maid who was setting refreshments on the garden table, opened her eyes wide.

My question must have shocked her terribly, because even her hands began trembling.

“You’ve watched me for a long time, so you should know, right? Why don’t I have any friends?”

“Well…”

Daisy lowered her head.

“So… that’s…”

“Sigh, Daisy. It’s okay. Just tell me honestly. I don’t have any friends because I’m unpleasant, right?”

At my self-deprecating words, Daisy stopped holding the teapot and reached out to hold my shoulders with a tearful expression.

She was the only person who had continued to care about me despite how much of a complete brat I had been.

It seemed she simply couldn’t bring herself to explain the reason I was bullied in her own words.

Yes.

I had no friends.

Unfortunately, it was true.

Whenever other young ladies my age gathered together at tea parties, chatting happily and filling the air with laughter, I would sit alone beside my mother and slowly dismantle my cake piece by piece.

Still, I had rarely felt lonely.

And there was a good reason for that.

Inside the castle, I had been too busy fighting with my brothers, while outside, I had been too busy following Nezar around like a lost puppy.

But as I said before, things were a little different now.

After remembering my past life and being reborn as the New Katrina, I had been given the most important goal of my life:

I had to find Nezar a lover.

To accomplish that goal, I needed to stop playing in the mud with my brothers and following Nezar around everywhere.

All of this was for the sake of a comfortable and peaceful old age.

“Daisy, how do I make friends?”

“I suppose you need to be able to have a proper conversation with them first. That way, you’ll have a chance to become close.”

“So you’re saying the old me couldn’t even hold a proper conversation?”

“Um… until two days ago, Miss Kate was… closer to an animal than a person. B-But if you continue behaving the way you are now, I’m sure you’ll be able to make friends without any trouble!”

Damn it.

Her words hurt my feelings, but Daisy was right.

Therefore, if I wanted to find a young lady whom Nezar would fall for, I needed to become a mature lady starting now.

A woman as soft as whipped cream cake—someone who drank tea with her pinky raised, covered her mouth whenever she laughed, and gave a gentle smile whenever she spoke!

“What kind of scheme are you plotting now that you’re sitting there grinning to yourself?”

Suddenly, I heard Rick’s voice.

I quietly closed the cover of the book I had been reading and raised my head.

I had been sitting at the garden table, enjoying tea time like all the other young ladies, when Rick—who apparently had grown far too bold—had ignored Mother’s orders and come looking for me anyway.

“Seriously, is something wrong with you? Why do you keep doing things you’ve never done before? You can barely even read the textbooks for your general education classes.”

Unlike earlier, Rick’s expression was quite serious.

He looked so devoid of humor that my lips, which had been about to spit out another insult, froze.

I placed the book I was holding on the table.

“Nothing’s wrong. I’m simply behaving a little more quietly for the sake of my future.”

“Don’t say ridiculous things. Is changing your personality somehow a condition for getting engaged to His Highness Nezar?”

Not a condition for getting engaged.

It’s a condition that might help me break off the engagement.

I shook my head to indicate that wasn’t the case, but perhaps my answer seemed like a lie, because Rick’s expression remained unconvinced.

“Kate, do you really like the Crown Prince that much?”

“Even if it isn’t because of Nezar? Maybe I simply went through puberty a little late. Why are you reacting so sensitively?”

There was no way I could tell him that I had remembered my past life.

Who would treat me like a normal person after hearing something like that?

Despite Rick’s suspicious gaze, I refused to back down and raised my chin.

Rick stared down at my face for a while before letting out a loud sigh.

“Fine. I’ll stop bothering you, so relax your eyes a little. …But if something is wrong, don’t suffer through it alone. Make sure you tell me or Brother Rockhard. And don’t go breaking perfectly good things again for no reason.”

Rick reached out and ruffled my hair.

Then, before long, he turned around and disappeared into the garden.

Perhaps because of his long strides, Rick’s presence quickly faded beyond the garden filled with the scent of marguerites.

Why is he suddenly acting like this?

I brushed the top of my head where Rick’s warmth still lingered.

He was only two years older than me. Why did he have to treat me like a child?

I opened my book again and took another sip from my teacup.

Just then, the maid who had been standing some distance away approached me.

Her expression was bright like the morning sunlight, so it seemed some good news had arrived.

“Miss! His Highness Nezar has come to visit!”

Clearly, one should never get ahead of oneself.

I rose from my seat with stiff, unnatural movements, like a machine.

Just thinking that Nezar would be waiting for me in the drawing room made my heart begin pounding.

Calm down, Kate.

You’re different from before now.

There is absolutely no reason for you to obediently let him torment you anymore!

But despite my firm resolve, my completely uncooperative legs moved forward hesitantly, one slow step at a time.