MPGF 43

Chapter 43 – “I Don’t Want to Confuse You”:

It was a reasonable suspicion.

After all, the way Hertian looked at Eleanor was noticeably different.

When he looked at me, his gaze was closed off and unreadable. But when he looked at Eleanor, it was full of affection, laced with longing and nostalgia.

Not even Ossen, with whom he’d supposedly spent a long time, had ever received such an expression from him.

If Liri had been here, she would’ve figured it out immediately.

‘Still, that’s the face of a man in love, no matter how you look at it.’

I was certain of it.

Even if I’ve been single all my life, it’s always easier to see other people’s romances clearly.

The question of “Then why didn’t Hertian and Eleanor end up together?” was soon answered.

“Sir Eleanor, you’re married, right?”

At some point, we had finished three glasses of wine in the dining room, and Eleanor widened her eyes in surprise.

“Was it that obvious? Oh my. I must be getting old. I have more wrinkles lately.”

“Your face gets rough if you’re always rolling around in the dirt,”

Hertian teased as she checked her reflection in the silverware.

Just as I suspected.

He had loved Eleanor, but she was already married.

“If you have any secrets for becoming as beautiful as Lady B, please let me know. My husband won’t stop nagging me about how dull my skin looks.”

“I’m not sure it’ll help, but I’ll give you some herbs that are good to add to your wash water.”

“There are herbs for that?”

“Tons. And if you need anything for wounds or recovery, just let me know. I can get it for you.”

“Lady B.”

She called me, her expression turning helpless. Then she asked seriously,

“Would you like to divorce Hertian and marry me instead?”

Hertian choked on his wine, coughing violently.

“If you’re here to ruin someone’s life, go back to the palace.”

“If I had known how beautiful and kind you were, I would’ve stolen you from him, husband or not.”

Their back-and-forth made me laugh out loud.

Eleanor truly was a woman worthy of love. Her easygoing personality and honest, open nature—she didn’t try to hide anything.

She had a charm opposite of mine. Very different from cute, timid Violet too.

A woman Hertian could definitely like. And being next to her made even me relax and laugh.

“She’s already mine.”

And yet Hertian still put on a performance in front of the woman he liked.

I shook my head and let out a small sigh.

It was obvious. He had never shown his feelings properly to Eleanor.

“They say marriage changes people. Are you even the same person I knew?”

No, he’s not, Sir Eleanor.

Knowing the truth, I realized Hertian’s situation was more miserable than I thought.

A pitiful man.

“How long have you two known each other?”

I asked, cutting in between their banter.

“Hmm, I never really counted, but it must be over ten years.”

“Twelve.”

“You remember that?”

Eleanor asked in surprise.

Hertian casually sipped his wine and replied,

“I guessed.”

I sighed inwardly.

You should’ve said, “I remember everything about you!”

He pretends well, but when it comes to actual romance, he’s completely clueless.

Why are all the handsome men in this novel so bad at love? It’s a shame.

“Still joking, huh.”

“It’s not a joke. I don’t care how long we’ve known each other.”

“Do you even care about anything? Always holding that sword with soulless eyes.”

“I do. You just don’t know about it.”

My heart nearly stopped. I almost dropped my fork full of dessert.

‘She’s the only one who doesn’t know—Eleanor, you fool!’

Now I understood why Betty kept reading romance novels all the time.

To be honest, after reading “In the Wake of Your Desperate Regret”, which this world is based on, I avoided romance stories for a while.

Because the retribution Serdis received didn’t seem nearly harsh enough compared to what he’d done to Violet. And the chaos he caused affected many others, making someone like me who’s never dated get completely put off by romance.

But watching someone else’s love story unfold in front of me like this was surprisingly fun.

Without even realizing, I had entered full spectator mode.

“Now that I think about it, you did seem livelier when you attended the Academy.”

At Eleanor’s comment, I turned back to Hertian.

“You attended the Academy, Duke?”

But he stiffened at my question. I could clearly see his dark eyes tremble.

Before I could question it, Eleanor answered.

“Marka—”

“He didn’t really attend. He enrolled briefly but had to leave soon after due to matters at the estate.”

Hertian cut her off before she could finish.

Eleanor looked at him in confusion.

Their eyes met and exchanged silent signals. Soon, Eleanor looked down and fell silent.

An uncomfortable stillness filled the dining room.

Just as I was struggling with the sudden chill in the air—

“Can we talk for a moment?”

Hertian stood up and gestured to Eleanor. Then he turned to me with a forced smile and said politely,

“My lady, you must be tired from entertaining our guest. Please rest.”

I could only nod politely.

For some reason, there was no room for me to join their conversation.

Training Ground of the Grand Duchy of Blandice.

Hertian led her toward the direction of the training ground, where he had spent countless hours with fellow knights.

Right before they arrived, he suddenly stopped walking.

“It was Lady B, right? The one you had a crush on?”

Eleanor was the one who spoke first.

She had noticed as soon as she saw Hertian at the estate.

A man who had never shown interest in anyone, calling someone his “wife” and introducing her with a soft smile. That alone made it clear he had changed.

As someone trained to detect the slightest hint of danger night and day, Hertian’s change was glaringly obvious to her.

She also remembered that some years after he had attended Marka Academy, his eyes had started to regain life. Eventually, he began to prefer reading and writing at his desk over sword training.

Back then, she hadn’t known he had fallen in love with someone. She only found out later, during the war, when she saw a pink letter he read night after night.

“The one you exchanged letters with every day—was that Lady B?”

Eleanor found it fascinating.

To think he actually married the person he had longed for. How romantic, and so unlike Hertian.

“There was a trick to it.”

A smirk spread across Hertian’s face. Eleanor moved closer, curious to hear what the trick was.

He removed his gloves and held out his hand.

“Oh! I got it!”

Eleanor exclaimed as if she had just figured something out.

“You noticed immediately, huh?”

As expected from sharp Eleanor.

Though the flower dye on his nails had long faded, she had caught on instantly.

“The veins on the back of your hand—women go crazy for that.”

She was convinced.

But she was wrong. Hertian clicked his tongue and looked at her with pity.

“Someone like you who only knows how to polish swords wouldn’t know about dyeing nails with flower pigment.”

“Dye them with what?”

“With balsam flowers. If the color stays until the first snow, it means your first love will come true. I endured it and succeeded in getting married.”

At that, Eleanor’s sun-kissed face turned pale.

“You dyed your nails? You mean blood, right? You’re not talking about something creepy, are you?”

“What a horrible thing to say.”

Hertian fondly looked at his pinky finger, where the flower dye had once been, smiling in satisfaction. Watching him, Eleanor shivered and rubbed her arms.

Her head was spinning. They say men change three times—once after war, once after inheriting their family name, and once after marriage. But Hertian had remained unchanged through the first two and dumped all his changes into the last.

“Who told you about this… ritual?”

“Ossen.”

Eleanor cursed Ossen briefly.

Then she let go of the thought.

‘Still, it’s better than him living like a corpse again.’

“Impressive. It’s not like you and she built affection through exchanging letters. You just sent a proposal?”

She had suspected it ever since Hertian hid that he went to Marka Academy.

And now, seeing him claim he married thanks to a superstition only confirmed it.

“You really are something else.”

“Quick on the uptake.”

“Enjoy it while it lasts. After two years of marriage, you end up just living like roommates.”

Hertian’s shoulders drooped at her words.

“Eleanor. There’s something I want to ask.”

“Sure, go ahead.”

“I don’t know how to win my wife’s heart.”

She looked puzzled. Why would you need to, if you’re already married?

“I can’t go into detail, but she has no feelings for me at all.”

As her face filled with shock, Hertian continued bitterly. Even before the marriage, and even after, he’d tried hard to be the kind of man Anette would like—but the results were disastrous.

Just yesterday, she’d talked about finding another man, without even considering him.

“I’m lost. I can’t talk to anyone else about this, but I figured since you’re a woman, you might have some advice.”

Faced with a dear friend struggling in love, Eleanor fell into deep thought.

She was surrounded by male knights, but had never really formed romantic connections with any of them.

Even her marriage was arranged, not one born of love.

‘Still, people’s hearts aren’t that different, are they?’

A moment later, Eleanor straightened her posture and declared,

“Take off your shirt. We’ve both trained under Calix, and people say our bodies are top-tier, right? If Her Highness sees that, she’ll definitely be pleased.”

She confidently patted her rock-hard abs, believing it was her secret weapon.

“That already didn’t work…”

But Hertian lowered his eyes with a pitiful expression.

“Unbelievable. That didn’t work?”

“Any other ideas?”

“How about making her jealous?”

Hertian’s expression hardened.

“Even if I can’t win her heart, I don’t want to confuse her.”

“It was just a thought. As a knight, I hate using shallow tricks anyway. But you know… you’re kind of cool right now? If she saw this side of you, she might fall for you too.”

“This side, huh… does that mean I should become even more of a jerk?”

He knew he was impressive.

In looks and status, he had never lacked compared to anyone else.

“But there’s a problem. I don’t really have any shortcomings to fix.”

Eleanor wagged her index fingers back and forth.

“Sorry, but I think I brought your flaw with me.”

A shadow fell over her previously excited face, and Hertian noticed it immediately.

“Knew it was too quiet to last.”

It had to be something Serdis did after returning to the imperial palace.

“They’ve issued a new command—from the palace. You’re being summoned to the battlefield again.”