IALFMFL CH 12

Even as I said it, I felt conflicted.

People might say that whenever I got angry, I would lose all reason and act recklessly, but that didn’t mean I was so hopeless that I would run straight to Nazar and tattle on everything.

Even in the past, when I had done nothing but act according to my own whims, I had never once borrowed Nazar’s position or power for my own sake.

The reason was simple.

I couldn’t handle his anger.

“It’s all right, Lady Katrina. I didn’t come along because of His Highness the Crown Prince.”

Charon seemed much calmer than she had been when I threw the teacup.

Ironically, I was the one who had become depressed.

“I meant that what I said about telling Nazar was also a lie. If I had to put it another way, I suppose I brought you out on impulse because I was angry.”

No matter how much I thought about it, it had been an incredibly reckless thing to do.

Ah! Damn it.

What mature young lady?

I hadn’t changed at all from my old self.

But even if the same situation happened again, I would probably do exactly the same thing.

Even if this meeting hadn’t been arranged for entirely innocent reasons, I couldn’t possibly leave Charon alone in a castle where she was being treated so unfairly.

So as for what I was supposed to do from here…

I’d think about it starting now.

“You’re almost like a p-prince, Lady Katrina.”

I lifted my gaze from the floor.

Charon was smiling gently, the corners of her lips slightly raised, but there was something about her expression that made it difficult to call it a genuine smile.

“I don’t know if I should be telling you this, but…… my eldest brother is actually in very poor health.”

Her eldest brother?

If she meant the young duke of the Entera family, she must have been referring to Turner Entera.

I removed the arm I had been resting my chin on and showed my interest, prompting Charon to continue.

“They say he has had an illness for quite a long time. When his health didn’t improve, he went south two years ago to recuperate. It has been three weeks since the Duchess went there to stay with him…… And it has only been about two and a half weeks since I arrived at Entera.”

“I’ve never heard anything about that.”

At my words, she smiled again.

It was a weak, drooping smile, as though she hadn’t eaten properly in days.

“The Duke has very high hopes for Brother Panshion. Even more so since the Duchess went south. Perhaps that’s why, but there are already many rumors among the servants that the heir will be changed. Brother Panshion doesn’t pay any attention to them…… Perhaps that’s another reason he doesn’t return to Entera. These days, he spends even more time in the Imperial Palace. That was around the time the head maid’s attitude toward me changed too.”

I had occasionally heard rumors that the heir of the Entera family was extremely frail.

I vaguely remembered hearing that he had gone south to recuperate, but I hadn’t known that the Duchess had gone with him.

Usually, that meant his condition was considerably serious.

“If I were Lady Mallen, I don’t think I could forgive Charon Entera either. An illegitimate child arriving in the middle of a troubled family situation and then taking the place of the Duchess while she is away…… How terrible would that be?”

“Didn’t you tell Sir Panshion about it?”

“It’s the same with Brother Panshion. He’s already having a hard enough time. I don’t want to create even more trouble for him to worry about.”

Charon could no longer even lift the corners of her lips.

W-What was I supposed to do at a time like this?

The last time I had comforted or consoled someone had been…

No, it had been at least fifteen years ago.

Ever since I had been born as Katrina, I had never once had to do anything for someone else.

Except Nazar, of course.

He was the center of my world.

“Um, so……”

Are you all right?

No. That sounded too formal.

Everything will be all right?

No, that wasn’t right either.

After bringing her out here, saying something like that would be far too irresponsible.

Then what was I supposed to say?

While I struggled to climb the towering wall of social etiquette I had built for myself, Charon suddenly lifted her head.

She must have been biting her lip, because blood was now streaming down from the scabbed skin.

“B-But thanks to you, Lady Katrina, I can breathe a little easier. It’s actually my first time leaving the castle without a maid! Thank you so much. I-I really mean it.”

It was nice that she was sincere, but the blood running down beneath her chin was about to drip onto her dress.

Worried that she might stain it, I handed her the handkerchief I had prepared.

“Wipe it.”

Charon accepted the handkerchief with a bewildered expression and dabbed at the area near her cheek.

Why was she wiping her cheek?

Didn’t people normally wipe around their mouths?

“Not there. Your chin.”

“Ah! Yes!”

Charon hurriedly wiped around her lips.

Only then did her strange appearance, which had made her look almost like a vampire, return to normal.

And I was supposed to turn someone like this into Nazar’s mistress?

I really hadn’t thought things through.

I let out a deep sigh and leaned my head against the carriage wall.

“……And that’s what has happened so far. What do you think?”

At my desperate question, Rick’s face twisted horribly, as though he had just seen the ghost of one of his ancestors.

I didn’t care.

Instead, I pressed myself even closer against his shoulder.

His clothes smelled like warm sunlight, as though they had just been washed that very day.

“Well? What do you think?”

Click.

Rick irritably closed the cover of his book and threw it onto the table.

“I thought you had changed a little, but apparently you’ve changed in a very strange direction.”

It had only been about fifteen minutes since I returned to Ezelot.

The entire ride back, my mind had been like a meadow caught in the middle of a violent storm.

If I swallowed my pride and asked Lockhard for help, I could use him to inform Panshion about Charon’s situation.

His feelings might be hurt a little, but that seemed manageable.

The problem was, I wasn’t sure whether doing so was actually the right thing.

Charon had chosen to keep silent of her own accord.

So if I interfered, wouldn’t it simply be meddling in the affairs of someone I wasn’t even particularly close to?

Ugh, whatever!

Who cared whether it was meddling or not?

No matter what, I couldn’t stand seeing Charon treated like an unwanted guest.

“C-Come here for a second.”

I stood up and grabbed Rick’s arm, but he didn’t move an inch, his expression still full of annoyance.

“Are you crazy? What exactly do you expect me to do in front of that Charon girl or whatever her name is?”

“I’m not asking you to do anything. Just keep Charon company while I go ask Lockhard for advice. You can at least do that for me, right? It’s not a big deal.”

“What do you mean, ‘you can do that’? Get off me already!”

Rick roughly shook his arm, but I clung to him even more tightly.

“I’ll grant one of your requests later too. I really will! Seriously! I swear, okay?”

“You’re getting more ridiculous by the day……”

Click.

That was when it happened.

I heard the soft sound of the door opening.

Someone had entered the study where only Rick and I had been.

“Lady Katrina?”

I knew that voice.

It was Charon, who was supposed to be waiting for me in the drawing room while drinking tea.

A moment later, a beautiful girl with long silver hair walked into the room.

Her movements were extremely cautious.

“Oh, so you were here. I wondered if something had happened because you didn’t come even after I waited for so long……”

Charon couldn’t finish her sentence.

Her eyes widened as her gaze landed directly on Rick.

Thinking this was my chance, I immediately stood up and introduced him.

“T-This is my third brother, Rick Ezelot. You remember the name I mentioned in the garden earlier, right?”

A small sigh came from beside me.

Sorry, Rick.

But it was too late now.

Rick slowly stood up and bowed toward Charon.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Lady Entera. I am Rick Ezelot of the Ezelot family.”

“H-Hello. I-I’m……”

Charon stopped speaking and took a very deep breath.

Then, just like the first day she had met me, she lowered her head deeply and spoke.

“I-I’m Charon Entera of the Entera family. It’s an honor to meet you!”

“There’s no need to greet me so formally. I’m the one who should be thanking you for keeping my troublesome little sister company.”

Ugh.

Rick answered with a quiet smile, speaking as smoothly and politely as a refined gentleman.

Even though I had always seen him act this way in formal settings, witnessing it with my own eyes still made my insides twist.

In the past, I had openly mocked him to his face for being completely different on the inside from how he appeared on the outside.

But not anymore.

Rick’s ability to shamelessly keep up appearances was actually an essential quality I, too, needed to learn as a lady.

“Who are you calling troublesome? That’s ridiculous. Lady Charon, don’t take him seriously. He’s only saying that as a joke.”

Rick didn’t even bother answering me anymore.

It was unfair.

He was always ordering me around in the study—telling me to bring books, put books away, or call for a maid whenever he pleased.

And now he was acting as though keeping a beautiful girl company was some impossible request!

I apologized to Charon once more before leaving the study and heading down the stairs.

The maids were wandering around near the hall with bright expressions, so it seemed Nazar had arrived.

There was no need to go looking for Lockhard’s room anymore, so I headed toward the drawing room on the first floor.

When I opened the door wide, however, I found a scene that was slightly different from what I had expected.

The first person I made eye contact with was Lockhard, sitting near the door.

“Well, well. Who do we have here? Our Ezelot family’s reckless little puppy has arrived.”

And then, surprisingly, it wasn’t Nazar.

It was Panshion.

I silently stumbled over my words before belatedly bowing my head.

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were in the middle of a meeting.”

Why is Sir Panshion here?

If he had arrived before me, that meant he must have gotten into a carriage almost immediately after we parted in the chrysanthemum garden.

As far as I knew, this was the first time he had ever visited Ezelot Castle.

And on a holiday, no less.

I had just turned around to quietly close the door when Nazar’s voice came from deeper inside the drawing room.

“It’s all right. Come in, Kate. We were about to finish anyway. Sir Panshion?”

“Yes. Then I’ll see you at the Imperial Palace, Your Highness.”

“We shall. You’ve worked hard even on a holiday.”

Panshion slowly rose from his seat.

His movements were heavy and sluggish, almost as though he had just woken up from a deep sleep.

Lately, it seemed like there had been an unusually large number of meetings.

And it wasn’t merely my imagination.

Over the past few days, both Lockhard and Nazar had been surprisingly difficult to see.

Once he had straightened his back, Panshion lifted his teacup and tipped the final remaining drop into his mouth.

His movements were as careless as though he had just finished a training session.

“Come here, Kate.”

Nazar was leaning against the sofa with a similarly exhausted posture, beckoning me toward him.

His languid voice drifted throughout the drawing room.

I instinctively started toward him, but soon stopped and shook my head.

There was something I had to do.

“No. I…… The person I actually need to speak with is Sir Panshion.”

The once-quiet room suddenly fell into an empty silence, as though a blizzard from the Arctic had swept through it.

Why did everything around me become so cold whenever I opened my mouth?

And why did it always happen when Nazar was around?

What on earth had I done wrong?

“I see. In that case, there’s no need for you to go somewhere else. You can do it right here.”

His smile was gentle.

But at the same time, the atmosphere was so chilling that I could feel a sharp shiver run down the back of my neck.