ICTIMP CH 02

Chapter 2. A Death Flag Right from the Start (2)

I flopped face-first onto the bed. When I first met Adel, I think I had acted all coy and demure, but somehow that felt like something that had happened in the distant past.

Ah, I was going to die in two years anyway, so what did formalities matter? And Adel didn’t seem to care much either.

No, it wasn’t just that he didn’t care. He wasn’t even looking at me. He was sitting at the walnut tea table, reading.

Just reading the long title about something like The Theory of Innate Evil was enough to make me sleepy.

I didn’t even know I had a book like that on my bookshelf. As soon as Adel left, I was going to throw it away.

“I’m bored. I want to go outside.”

The moment I muttered that, Adel’s voice came flying at me.

“No.”

“Who are you to decide?”

“I am Anastasia’s close friend.”

I felt an overwhelming urge to throw a pillow at Adel’s smugly handsome face.

“Let’s break up our friendship.”

Only then did Adel slightly raise his head.

Unlike what one might expect from someone who lived such a strictly disciplined life, Adel’s hair was slightly disheveled.

Around dawn, its brilliant golden color swayed temptingly like a forest blazing with golden light.

He had probably ended up looking like that because he had rushed over to stop me from going out, but somehow, he gave off an atmosphere that made the tip of my tongue itch.

I want to touch it……

Whether he knew about my impulse or not, Adel calmly spoke to me as I glared at him while clutching the pillow.

“The Count asked me to take good care of you. Until he returns, I am responsible for your safety.”

I only half-listened to him. His pure-white hand, like birch bark, closed the book in a neat motion, and the well-defined joints of his fingers caught my attention.

“If I go outside, you can just protect me.”

At my grumbling, Adel smiled. It was such a fresh and innocent smile that I briefly regretted ever thinking he was sexy.

Get a grip. He belongs to someone else.

“Have you finally decided to go out with me? However, I’ll have to decline today. Please rest comfortably in your bedroom.”

I pressed my lips together.

“I’m sorry that I have to be so blunt. But Anastasia, there’s no color in your face. If you go outside right now, you’ll collapse.”

I rubbed my cheek. I could definitely feel that I had less energy than before.

I was so dizzy that even sitting was difficult, but despite that, giving up was impossible. I was going crazy over how precious every single day was.

“Then what about tomorrow?”

This time, Adel took a step back.

“If you’re feeling well enough, I suppose a short walk would be all right.”

“Okay.”

I decided to be satisfied with that for now and nodded, which made Adel look relieved.

“Thank you for understanding what I mean.”

“Hmph.”

Just you wait.

Adel stayed for several more hours before leaving. I chewed on a candy with a crunching sound as I vowed revenge.

I could let today slide since my condition had worsened as the day went on, but the fact that I had missed the fireworks yesterday was still a deep, bitter regret.

I was seriously fine yesterday! We had a carriage, and I could have gone with the maids!

I was determined to make him pay for this injustice.

Fortunately, my teeth were still strong. Thinking that, I unwrapped another candy, when Ilina, who was tidying the tea table, quietly approached me.

“My lady, I’ll clean up the trash.”

“No, leave it.”

“Huh?”

I smiled at the bewildered Ilina.

“I have a use for it.”

That day, I took the disgusting medicinal tonic twice. It was supposed to restore my strength, but it tasted absolutely awful and apparently had an entire snake boiled into it.

Then I fell into a deep sleep.

Fortunately, perhaps the heavens had recognized my burning desire for revenge, because I managed to regain my strength.

Adel came to visit a little after lunchtime, and I greeted him with a bright smile at the front gate.

“Hi, Adel. As you can see, I’m completely full of energy.”

“You look better than yesterday. I’m glad.”

As Adel answered, his face seemed to glow.

As always, his rose-colored eyes shimmered faintly, filled with goodwill, while his lips only ever spoke noble and hopeful words.

When I first encountered Adel through the novel, he had seemed incredibly perfect and wonderful. But now he was nothing but irritating. I suppose being too kind could be a problem too.

“You remember what you said yesterday, right? I won’t be greedy. I just want to take a walk nearby.”

“Of course. Take my hand.”

Adel held out his hand. I merely glanced down at it.

“I can walk by myself.”

“Are you still uncomfortable with me?”

Adel suddenly murmured in a subdued voice. I thought of the Anastasia from the original story, who had become increasingly uncomfortable around Adel as her illness worsened.

Before I could respond, Adel added,

“I misspoke. Please forget it. I’m simply happy that I get to come outside like this with Anastasia.”

It seemed Adel didn’t want to talk about it anymore, so we walked side by side.

Once we had gotten a fair distance away from the Count’s estate, I stopped walking.

I stared at Adel.

“Adel, I have a favor to ask.”

“Please, go ahead.”

Adel stopped along with me and readily responded. I tilted my head toward him, making sure to show him my beautiful, flower-like face from the perfect angle.

“Will you grant it?”

“……If it is not something against propriety, then anything.”

As expected, Adel had already put up a wall before I even asked. Even though he was the male protagonist, even the maids sometimes shrieked when they saw my face, yet this guy showed absolutely no reaction.

How disappointing.

Anyway, I laid the groundwork to persuade Adel.

“You know, I probably won’t live very long.”

“Please don’t say things like that again……”

“Listen until I’m finished.”

“……All right.”

He looked thoroughly displeased, but Adel backed down.

I began speaking slowly and calmly so that I wouldn’t appear emotional.

“I’ve known for a long time that I was probably going to die. But it feels like such a waste to spend my remaining time locked up in my bedroom, unable to do anything. You were trying to protect me because you were worried, but all I want is to visit different places and see as much as I can while I still have this short time. But even after I tell you this, you’ll keep stopping me, won’t you?”

“It’s all for your sake.”

I stepped closer to Adel. There had already only been a few steps between us, but now we were close enough to embrace.

I grabbed the edge of his clothes so he couldn’t step away.

“Then shouldn’t you grant whatever I ask? If you have even a little conscience.”

Adel’s expression stiffened slightly. I didn’t stop.

“You keep ignoring my wishes and forcing your own way on me. If you keep doing this, I don’t think I can promise I won’t resent you after I die.”

At last, a shadow fell across his face.

“I’m sorry. I thought this was the best thing I could do.”

“You never give up hope. You probably think my parents might actually find a cure.”

Adel was worried about me, but his way of expressing it was nothing like what I wanted.

He was even stubborn.

Even if Adel believed he was doing the right thing—and perhaps he really was—the problem was that he didn’t respect the wishes of the person actually suffering from the illness: me.

When I reminded him of that, guilt filled Adel’s eyes.

“Anastasia, tell me everything you want. I will grant your request even if I have to give my life for it.”

You just said everything!

I desperately forced the corners of my mouth back down.

“From today onward, whenever you have time, would you come visit me?”

I asked in a deliberately gentle tone. Adel blinked.

“Do you…… truly mean that?”

“Yes. It means you care about me that much, right? Honestly, I’m a little touched.”

“Anastasia……”

Adel looked at me without hiding his happiness, and for a moment, my heart almost wavered.

Why does his face literally glow like that……

He confessed his feelings in an excited voice.

“I thought you hated me. For a while, you wouldn’t even smile at me, and you even told me that you wished I would become mute so I wouldn’t say another word. But I came to see you anyway, making every excuse and forcing my way in whenever I could. Even though I knew you would dislike it, I couldn’t stop worrying about you, so I acted selfishly.”

Well, the real Anastasia probably couldn’t handle all that positive energy of his.

When you tell someone who is suffering from an incurable disease and slowly dying to “have hope,” sometimes all they can hear is mockery.

Adel’s noble and kind intentions were undeniable, but to Anastasia, who had grown exhausted from her long battle with the illness, they probably hadn’t sounded very pleasant.

“But lately, you…… You still seem to dislike me, but at least you don’t ignore me anymore. I suppose I became excited without realizing it. I never knew that my presumptuous interference was hurting you so deeply……”

“It’s okay. Things like that happen. Then shall we hold hands as a sign of reconciliation?”

I held out my hand to Adel.

“Please.”

Adel took my hand.

Holy crap, that was incredibly thrilling.

Ah, no! He’s the male protagonist! No matter how perfect every single joint of his fingers was, no matter how much better they felt than velvet or silk, I needed to calm down!

I took a deep breath and barely managed to regain my composure.

Now it was time to get my revenge on Adel.

I slipped my free hand into my pocket and pulled out the candy wrapper I had prepared earlier. Then I deliberately dropped it onto the ground with a little plop.

As expected, Adel immediately reacted.

“Anastasia, you dropped a candy wrapper. Wait a moment, I’ll pick it up.”

“No, pretend you didn’t see it.”

“What?”

Adel asked in confusion. I gently tugged on his shoulder, making him straighten up after he had already bent halfway down.

“You said you’d grant all my requests, remember? Just leave it.”

Adel looked utterly bewildered.

“But isn’t throwing trash on the roadside wrong?”

“That’s right. I did something wrong. And I’m not going to regret it or correct it.”

His crystal-clear eyes wavered.

“Then I……”

“I told you to leave it.”

How is it? Torturous, isn’t it? You feel like you’re going crazy, don’t you? That little good boy instinct inside you is writhing, isn’t it?

“Why are you doing this?”

Adel, who had never made a moral mistake in his entire life, was visibly flustered.

He was anxious that someone passing by might notice the candy wrapper I had dropped. But if he picked it up, he was afraid it might damage his relationship with me.

It was incredibly childish, but seeing Adel so startled filled me with delight.

This method wouldn’t have worked on anyone else, but for Adel, who was practically made of ethics, morality, and nobility, it was absolutely perfect. Adel’s life was a textbook, and he himself was practically the embodiment of a law book.

And I was a petty, underhanded, vindictive person.

“Because I’m a bad person.”

Even though I readily admitted it, Adel tried to deny it.

“You’re not a bad person……”

I ignored him.

“And I’m going to give you this.”

I placed the small plastic wrapper in Adel’s hand. Adel stared at his palm, then looked at me, then lowered his gaze back to his palm.

“It’s a candy wrapper.”

Adel murmured quietly. I gave him what was practically an order disguised as a request.

“Here. Throw it on the ground too.”

Adel froze.