TGBAP 45

Late May, Imperial Year 322.

As the sun slowly grew hotter and summer approached, the ghost manor was as quiet as ever.

Ria finished a mountain of laundry and stretched long.

On the drying rack hung clothes an adult might wear. Ria fiddled with them, recalling the clothes Lucian had worn when he first came here.

[When did he get so big.]

The little imperial prince who had held a soul wedding with her had grown to the point that the word “little” no longer fit, becoming a proper teenager.

[Well, he’s fifteen now, so it makes sense.]

Three years until adulthood. That meant, in other words, that she had lived with Lucian for seven whole years.

Time was passing too quickly.

Before she met Lucian, she had wished even this kind of boredom would hurry up and pass. But watching him grow day by day made every single day feel precious.

[……But that brat doesn’t even know how I feel.]

These days, Lucian wasn’t as cute or affectionate as he used to be.

The boy who used to cling and cling when he was little now hated even holding hands, and if she tried to pat his head, he would dodge her touch as if it annoyed him.

He had even once threatened her, telling her not to come into his room.

[So he’s all grown up, is that it.]

No matter how much it was just puberty, it still stung that he kept pushing her away.

[And it feels like he has something on his mind, too.]

Once a week, Lucian goes down to the village and spends time with Dio.

At first, whenever he came back from going out, he’d be busy chattering about what had happened, but at some point he began clamping his mouth shut, and his face grew darker by the day.

When she asked if something was wrong, all she got back was that it was nothing.

If they talked it over together, maybe his worries would be resolved—so why was he hiding it? Did he not need her help?

As Ria tidied Lucian’s blanket, she looked around his room. Traces of seven years had soaked into every corner.

It was ridiculous that the only time she could enter his room with peace of mind was when Lucian wasn’t here.

Suddenly, his desk caught her eye. More precisely, the framed picture on top of it stood out.

[Hey there, husband.]

Ria sat down in front of the desk and brought the frame over.

[How nice would it be if you followed me around like when you were little, going “Ria! Ria!”]

Inside the frame was a drawing she had made.

How he looked at eight years old, when he first came here. Beside him, dressed in formal wear, a woman was drawn.

That woman was her.

The finished version that, following Lucian and Kaiser’s words, she had corrected and corrected and corrected until it finally came close to how she looked.

Even though it was her face, it felt unfamiliar beyond measure.

Even while drawing a new picture with feedback, she had always had a question.

[Am I really this pretty?]

If it wasn’t that Lucian and Kaiser had rose-tinted glasses on, then it had to be her face.

[Still, I just can’t get used to it.]

The awkward feeling that it was like another woman was standing beside Lucian. If someday Lucian became an adult and brought a new bride, would it feel like this?

[Lucian, grow up slowly. I still want to be with you more.]

Whispering to the Lucian in the frame, Ria laid her head down on the desk.

* * *

At the same time, in the capital’s street-stall district.

The place where stalls stretched in a long line was the largest market in the capital.

Fruit, food, furniture, trinkets—there was nothing you couldn’t find. Normally this place was loud and bustling, but today it was even more lively than usual.

“Ugh, look how many people.”

Dio, who had finally managed to squeeze out of the crowd, clicked his tongue.

“That damn Crown Prince. Why does he throw a festival every time something happens? Right, Lucian?”

“…….”

Lucian was silently looking somewhere else.

The moment Dio turned to look at him, he saw nearby women sneaking glances in their direction.

Mixed into those fierce stares were not only women’s eyes, but also men’s gazes full of curiosity and jealousy.

Dio narrowed his eyes at Lucian like a flatfish.

“You unlucky bastard.”

“……Are you talking to me?”

He hadn’t even heard what Dio said earlier, but when it was an insult at him, he picked it up perfectly.

“Yeah, you. Is there anyone else here besides you?”

“Why are you picking a fight again.”

“Hmph, because you’re narrow-minded, that’s why.”

Lucian shook his head with a here-we-go-again expression.

“Back then, it felt like our popularity was about the same…….”

Because Lucian’s looks ripened day by day, Dio’s popularity had turned into a roadside pebble.

They said his refined, noble-looking appearance, paired with the lean muscles that showed here and there through his clothes, was Lucian’s unexpected charm or whatever.

“Anyway, why are you so low-pressure today. Did you fight with Ria?”

“Who fought. It’s not that.”

“Then what is it.”

“This time, what did they say this gathering is for?”

It was obvious he was changing the subject, but broad-minded Dio decided to let it slide just this once.

“It’s not really a festival, but a welcome celebration for the Crown Prince’s return.”

The son of the Audrian Empire. Crown Prince Leopold Odelion. He had finished two years of study abroad and returned to the imperial palace just yesterday.

“Plus, in two months it’ll be the Crown Prince’s fifteenth birthday. They couldn’t hold a birthday banquet for the last two years, so this time it’ll be flashy, right?”

A crowd far larger than now would gather in the capital.

“Hey, you have the same birthday as the Crown Prince. Let’s watch the circus and eat something good then! I’ll pay for everything!”

“……Yeah, the birthday’s the same.”

The excited Dio sensed something off and turned his head.

Because Lucian, unlike the frown he had worn earlier, was now grinding his teeth, showing naked killing intent.

What his gaze landed on was, of all things, a poster with words congratulating the Crown Prince’s return.

After glaring at it for a long time, Lucian turned his body away.

“Hey, hey! Come with me!”

Even when Dio hurried after him from behind, Lucian had no room to look back.

One year ago, Lucian happened to learn that the Crown Prince, whom he had thought was his older brother, was the same age as him.

‘If we’re the same age, how is he my brother?’

Up until then, he hadn’t particularly tried to find out about the imperial family.

And that made sense—until he was eight, he had grown up somewhere no one’s eyes reached, and hadn’t he been sent to the ghost manor under the pretext of a soul wedding?

Of course, meeting Ria was the greatest stroke of luck in his life, but separately from that, the fact remained that the imperial family had thoroughly abandoned him.

Then, after learning that the Crown Prince and he were the same age, he began to look into the imperial family.

And he became certain of one thing.

‘From the start, I was never even born.’

All the imperial citizens know that the imperial grandchild is only the Crown Prince. Nowhere did he hear any story of a young prince who grew up in the cold palace.

To make matters worse, yesterday, he confirmed the Crown Prince’s return ceremony with his own eyes together with Dio.

And only then did he understand why the Crown Prince was the same age as him.

‘We were twins.’

After going back and forth to the village for over seven years, he knew the superstitions about twins, at least roughly.

And so he understood why only he had become a person who, in the imperial family, was treated as if he had never been born.

Puberty—the time when you’ve just begun to establish your sense of self and gradually grow as an adult.

Before he could even properly go through puberty, Lucian had had his very existence denied.

He was confused.

He was angry.

He didn’t know where to vent this rage that had lost its way.

Every day, it felt like he was being swallowed by an endless expanse of anger.

[Your face hasn’t looked very good lately. Is something wrong?]

When he suddenly recalled what Ria had said a few days ago, the anger that had been rising to his throat cooled quickly.

‘I can’t tell Ria.’

Now that he’d grown a bit, he knew how much she cherished and loved him.

And he also knew how hard it was to silently embrace a child who suddenly appeared.

He owed her a debt he could never repay in his lifetime. That was why he didn’t want to burden her with worry anymore.

But contrary to those feelings, because his heart was wrapped in anger, he couldn’t control his emotions well.

So these days, because he didn’t want to get angry at Ria, he was avoiding her.

He had to solve the problem he was going through as soon as possible.

‘But where on earth do I even start?’

The root of the problem was the imperial family—specifically, resentment toward those who abandoned him.

But officially, he was a prince who had never been born, and if he barged into the imperial palace right now and caused a scene demanding to know why they treated him like he didn’t exist, he’d be driven out before he even reached the Emperor.

‘What do I want…….’

What did he have to do to seize the darkness settled in his heart?

Did he have no choice but to let it rot alone and just wait until he felt better?

‘I just want to ask. Why did you make me like this.’

Why did they never come to see him even once.

Did they just want to treat him like a child who didn’t exist.

With what thoughts did they send him to the ghost manor.

Were they trying to kill him like this.

If they were going to be this irresponsible, then…… they should have just killed him when he was born.

‘Ah, Ria would hate that.’

At the last thought that came to him, Lucian immediately thought of Ria.

A small breathing hole opened in his stifling heart.

‘If Ria weren’t here, what would I be like by now?’

It was a hypothesis he didn’t even want to imagine, more than being abandoned by family.

* * *

“I’m back.”

Lucian, who came in just before evening, immediately took off his hat and necklace.

Then the somewhat ordinary hair turned white, and his eyes began to gleam gold.

While adjusting his top, Lucian suddenly realized that it was quiet around him.

“Ria?”

Normally, someone would greet him and ask if he was back, but he couldn’t see anyone. Startled, Lucian hurriedly searched all around the manor.

The kitchen, living room, library, music room—he looked through the entire manor, but he still couldn’t find her.

His breath grew ragged, and his hands and feet trembled. It was an anxiety incomparable to any fear he had ever felt in his life.

“……Ria!”

Clutching at his pounding heart, Lucian kept calling for Ria from the second-floor corridor.

[Lucian, did you call me?]

Then, she popped out of his room.

Lucian stopped as he was and stared at her as if nailed in place.

Ria simply tilted her head with her usual bright smile.

Relief flooded him, and at the same time, emotions running wild on their own sparked anger.

“Where were you, coming out now! I was looking for you forever!”

[I was cleaning your room. Is that really something to get that mad about?]

When Ria puffed out her cheeks and grumbled about why he was getting angry, Lucian, without realizing it, grew irritated.

“And I told you not to go into my room without permission!”

[I only cleaned it, only cleaned it! You! Since when have you been so distant that you tell me not to come in. I looked, and there’s dust packed into every corner.]

Ria flew forward and scolded him, pointing into the room. Lucian flinched and wrinkled the bridge of his nose.

Ria, who had been wearing a displeased expression, let out a long sigh and crossed her arms.

[Are you really sure nothing’s going on?]

“…….”

[You know, right? That you’ve been snapping at me a lot lately.]

“When have I ever……!”

[Look, you’re doing it even now.]

For a moment, Lucian was left speechless, his lips parting and closing. She was right. But he didn’t want to admit it.

‘I don’t even know why I’m like this.’

He didn’t want to snap at Ria of all people. But somehow, he snapped at her the most.

Once he flared up, he’d feel better, but then the guilt that followed would torment him.

[They say that happens when you go through puberty, but it doesn’t feel like that’s the only reason for you.]

When he raised his head slightly, he saw Ria, worrying only about him.

Suddenly, he wanted to tell her. The thoughts he’d had all this time, the resentment and anger toward the imperial family, and also that he and his brother were actually twins.

All those complicated thoughts surged up to his throat.

[We’re not people who’ve only met once or twice—we’ve lived together for seven whole years. If there’s something I can help with, tell me. I’m worried, that’s why.]

At Ria’s words that followed, Lucian closed the mouth he’d been about to open.

Right, worry. He didn’t want to burden her with worry anymore.

“……It’s nothing, so just leave me alone.”

Even unnecessary words slipped out, but he had no room to look at Ria. Just controlling his emotions was already more than he could handle.

Lucian passed right by Ria and went into his room.

Click-

Locking the door and leaning against it, Lucian’s eyes fell on his room, now even cleaner than before he went out.

It wasn’t like he made much of a mess, but there was still a clear difference between when Ria’s touch had reached it and when it hadn’t.

As he sighed and headed for the bed, he saw something placed on the desk.

Come back to being the little groom from before!

Along with the playful message, there was a mark pointing to the picture placed right above it.

In that instant, Lucian let out a hollow chuckle.

He looked at himself from the time when he knew nothing, then turned his gaze away.

“It’s too late to go back to before. I’ve learned too much.”

A lonely remark that no one could hear scattered into empty air.