Chapter 10
“Or maybe he’s just not interested in you.”
“…Does it really seem that way?”
“Maybe. You said he’s been avoiding you lately, right? Probably because he doesn’t like you. Doesn’t even want to talk to you.”
Despite Lilliana’s sudden change in opinion—as if flipping a switch—Ruttger grew serious. He was still deeply confused. When he heard Anita was going to Aberdeen University, he impulsively followed her. The more she avoided him, the more desperate he became. And when some nobody confessed to her, he felt downright awful.
“Has she really stopped liking me?”
Ruttger muttered hollowly.
“That’s why I’m saying I’ll help make her like you again!”
Lilliana cut in before he could even wallow in disappointment.
Oddly enough, Ruttger had always been convinced that Anita liked him. She was always there when he turned around. Even when he did something stupid, she would console him, saying it was okay.
So Ruttger thought there would never be a problem between them—as long as he decided he liked her, everything would fall into place. Selfishly, he had hoped she still liked him. He never even considered the possibility that Anita—who had been by his side for over ten years—might change. But what if… what if her feelings really had changed? What if she met someone else and drifted far away from him?
Was it possible that Anita could end up hating him forever?
That idea, one he had never even imagined in the more than ten years they’d known each other, struck him hard.
Anita Rodel’s routine had always been simple. Even after coming to a new place like Aberdeen University, not much had changed. Her life remained uneventfully plain, yet peaceful.
Sitting at her desk, Anita pulled out a sheet of letter paper and began writing a letter to her parents. There wasn’t much to say.
I’m doing well. Everyone is kind. The city is amazing. I’m keeping up with my studies.
After scribbling out the lifeless update, she picked up another sheet. This time, it was a letter for the Vailan couple.
She wasn’t quite sure why she was the one handling this, but…
Ruttger is doing well. He seems to have made a lot of friends already. Blah blah blah.
Writing carefully like a vet noting down a dog’s health status, Anita folded the letter and shoved it into a drawer.
It was the weekend, so Anita had plenty of free time. After finishing the letters, she wondered what to do next and instinctively picked up her biology textbook. As she flipped to the page she had last stopped at, she recalled something Ruttger had once said:
“Why do you live such a boring life? No wonder you don’t have any friends.”
Anita had never thought of friends as a necessity. She believed they were optional—nice to have, but not essential. She thought she didn’t care. But the fact that those words kept resurfacing suggested they had lodged somewhere deep in her heart.
That scornful gaze and condescending tone from her memory hadn’t dulled with time—they had only grown sharper.
Am I really that pathetic?
If anyone saw her now, most would probably offer the same advice:
Half the world is full of men. Maybe you’ll feel better if you meet someone else.
As if.
Anita had never been particularly interested in people. She didn’t feel desperate for friends, and even less for a man.
Unable to flip another page, she just kept fidgeting with the book cover before standing up and facing the mirror.
Messy black hair combed down with no effort. An expressionless face. Skin so pale it looked corpse-like—probably from growing up without much sunlight.
Anita ran her hand meaninglessly across her face, eyes dull, before stepping away from the mirror. She knew Ruttger well. Even if she were the most beautiful woman he’d ever meet, he still wouldn’t be interested in her.
She stood blankly for a long time before letting out a deep sigh. Again. She’d wasted time doing nothing again. She had come to college wanting to become a better version of herself. To breathe easier away from his shadow. No matter how things started, her thoughts always seemed to end in the same place.
“You want to work here?”
“Yes.”
The place Anita had visited was a small bookstore. Well, more of a café where people could read books and have drinks.
Located across from the university, this café was the perfect place to be safe from Ruttger. He hated books. The only slight concern was that there was an art supply store nearby, but that wasn’t a big issue.
“Are you a student?”
“Yes. I attend Aberdeen University.”
“Aberdeen?”
Anita understood the shop owner’s reaction. Aberdeen was considered one of the more expensive universities. Most students were at least from middle-class or noble families. Her family wasn’t noble, but they had never been short on money.
Aside from a few scholarship students, most attendees were leisurely rich kids. They coasted through school and later used their degree like a trophy in society.
After eyeing Anita for a while, the shop owner nodded, seemingly satisfied with the assumption that she was just some rich girl wanting a try at part-time work.
Not entirely wrong, since Anita hadn’t applied for the money.
“Alright then. The pay is as listed here. You can start in two days, and we’ll train you then.”
Landing the job more easily than expected, Anita left the shop looking a little dazed.
“Anita!”
While walking down the street, Anita’s eyes widened at the sound of a familiar voice. Like a scene from a horror novel, she slowly turned her head with a creak—and of course, it was him.
“Long time no see.”
That senior whose face was now just a blur. The one who had confessed out of nowhere after asking for directions once—and had then been chased off by Ruttger.
The man, whose name Anita couldn’t even remember, blocked her path with a gleam in his eye.
Though he was a bit chubby, he didn’t take up enough space to block the whole street. Anita moved to avoid him.
“Let’s talk.”
The greasy tone from last time was gone, replaced with a serious one. But Anita had no intention of entertaining him—she had absolutely nothing to say.
