WFMW 66

Chapter 66

Think as You Like

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2024.04.26

Having learned the entire truth, Ceder could no longer add anything to that incident.

In the meantime, the Duchess’s condition rapidly worsened, and a few days later, she quietly passed away.

The funeral was modest, which was natural since her husband, the Duke, had no intention of holding a grand ceremony.

Not long after, Lady Briar officially became the Duchess.

Ceder, unable to face Grisha, kept his head bowed whenever he was near her.

“I’m sorry, Grisha.”

Even these words of apology remained buried deep within his chest.

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As he recalled the events of long ago, Ceder wiped his face.

“Back then, without any strength of my own, I couldn’t find any evidence. My father covered up any proof pointing to my mother… I had promised myself that someday I would repay Grisha for the debt of my heart.”

He hadn’t expected things to unfold this way. Grisha’s words echoed vividly in his mind.

[You’re someone precious to me. Give them back.]

When he met Grisha again after a long time, her demand was clear: she wanted him to divorce Nelly.

She had even carried feelings for him all this time.

Yet, Ceder’s heart burned just the same.

“Why does it have to be Nelly?”

For the first time, he realized someone who simply being nearby could bring him peace of mind existed.

The marriage had begun as a contract unrelated to their will, but he had come to think that spending their lives together might be fine…

[If you feel sorry for me, then you should step back. Isn’t that right?]

Grisha pointedly indicated Nelly. She didn’t want the title of Duchess or wealth—she just wanted him to return Nelly to her.

Ceder couldn’t bring himself to answer. Grisha, as she had in the past, turned away with a look of contempt, her eyes scolding him.

[See? You’re all words, big brother. Back then and even now.]

Being hated by Grisha was painful. The weight on his already burdened heart grew even heavier.

Yet, he couldn’t give up Nelly. Confused by his own feelings, Ceder repeatedly asked himself:

“Why couldn’t I nod?”

What was she asking of him? It was merely a contractual arrangement to ease mutual inconvenience.

Even the circumstances didn’t favor continuing a contract marriage.

“Because of this contract marriage, Nelly is actually in more danger. Maybe it would be safer to entrust her to Grisha. She seems sincere too…”

Soon, Nelly would inherit her fortune. She had no reason to maintain the contract marriage any longer.

And someone had appeared willing to protect her with their life, so perhaps freeing her would be best.

“But I don’t want to.”

A fierce resistance rose in a corner of his heart.

If he looked closely, he could understand its source. Yet, he deliberately averted his gaze.

“Let me bury my feelings for a while. After all, there’s not much time left in this contract.”

For now, he would act as usual and escort her to the academy. Ultimately, the contract marriage and Nelly’s future rested on her own will.

Even if he decided on his own to hand Nelly over to Grisha, it wasn’t something he could unilaterally do.

“After she inherits, her feelings might change.”

Thus, Ceder put a hold on his emotions.

But no sooner had he resolved to bury them than Nelly, drunk, flung open the lid he had tried to keep shut and embraced him, confessing sweetly:

[Ceder, I like you.]

Burdened by the weight of his feelings for Grisha, he had ignored Nelly as well. Yet she refused to let him run away.

[Why do you keep avoiding me?]

If he were truly an irrelevant stranger, he could have ignored her.

“Why do you keep shaking me?”

She begged him not to turn away, not to distance himself, promising to correct any mistakes herself. All he could say was:

[You’ve done nothing wrong. The problem is that you’re too beautiful.]

Why was she so irresistibly lovable? He couldn’t let go of her hands.

And today, Ceder finally opened the doors of his heart completely. He could no longer avoid her.

[Because I’ve come to like you.]

He was already defeated in front of her.

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What is it like to be hit in the head with a hammer? My eyes blinked in a daze.

“Did Ceder just say what I think he said?”

Even though it was my native language, it sounded like a foreign tongue from a distant country.

I tried to replay his words in my mind but couldn’t comprehend them, so I asked him again:

“You’ve come to like me? What does that mean?”

“Exactly what it sounds like. I’ve come to like you.”

“…?”

My mind filled with question marks as I froze.

Like? So, he had positive feelings for me? That meant Ceder had such feelings toward me.

“Why would he say that in this situation?”

We were deep in the forest chasing monsters. A Dark Wolf lay dead at his feet.

“We were just arguing over my health management moments ago.”

Specifically, I had been stopping him from feeding me vegetables and making me exercise.

In this context, I couldn’t understand why “like” suddenly came up.

More importantly:

“If you like someone, you just like them. What does it mean to have ‘come to like’ them?”

Did he mean he shouldn’t have liked me but somehow did? Or that he liked me despite having no reason to?

The more I thought, the less positive it seemed—it almost felt like a negative intention.

Yet, seeing his faintly disarmed smile, I doubted it carried that meaning.

“Could it be that he literally means he feels affection?”

While I tried to read his heart, Ceder’s face gradually darkened.

He ruffled his hair and spoke in resignation:

“If it’s awkward, pretend you didn’t hear it.”

“Why is it awkward? I like you too, Ceder.”

“What?”

His silver-gray eyes clouded as he stared at me. I shrugged.

“I like you, I like Hail, I like all the knights of the Azure Dragon. Being with them feels comfortable.”

Ceder stared at me dumbfounded for a moment, then let out a slow, almost sigh-like laugh.

“…It’s not that it’s awkward, you just don’t understand.”

“Don’t understand what?”

“Forget it. I thought you were a grown woman, but you’re just a child in a grown body.”

“What do you mean?! Are you insulting me?”

Ceder’s large hand casually ruffled my head.

I puffed my cheeks like a pufferfish and tilted my head. His words didn’t quite make logical sense.

“But you can’t be jealous over liking someone. I like meat, but I don’t get jealous of vegetables that replace it.”

At my comment, Ceder’s eyebrows shot up.

“Why that metaphor?”

“Because right now, my favorite thing is meat?”

“So you’re saying I’m on the same level as meat? If both I and the meat fall into the sea, who should I save?”

“Um…”

Do I really have to save him? I can’t even swim.

‘Even if I could swim, could I carry one of Ceder’s legs? Clearly, we’d need magic, not strength.’

Evaporating seawater? Or using levitation magic?

While I pondered these technicalities, Ceder’s expression darkened further. He ran a hand through his hair and muttered:

“Ah, this hurts my pride too.”

Ah! I’d caused a misunderstanding by taking too long to respond. I quickly answered bravely:

“Of course I’ll save you! Raw meat won’t help—I can’t even cook.”

“Stop. The more we talk, the more miserable I feel. Just forget it.”

“But it’s strange.”

I grabbed the hem of Ceder’s coat as he turned away, and cautiously voiced the interpretation I had hesitated to speak, fearing it sounded self-absorbed:

“When you say you like me, it sounds like you’re saying you love me.”

“….”

Ceder looked down at me silently.

Even as I felt his gaze, I couldn’t bring myself to meet his eyes.

‘Did I say something unnecessary?’

I should have just laughed it off as a silly joke.

It was already awkward, and with Ceder clamming up, the tension only increased.

Eventually, I couldn’t hold back, and with a flushed face, looked up at him.

“Ceder?”

When I finally raised my head, he turned his own away.

And in a low, subdued voice, he answered:

“…Think as you like.”

Think as I like?

“That means my thoughts are correct.”

I held onto the arm of the man who kept avoiding me and asked seriously:

“Do you really love me?”

“I…”

His silvery-gray eyes, tinged with blue, flickered.

Like the moon obscured by clouds in the night sky, wavering.

Usually impassive, now he revealed his emotions completely.

Confusion, hesitation, and yet a clear, shining desire, unmistakable even to someone usually oblivious to emotions.