Chapter 28. You Are Too Difficult
Belladonna tried to kiss him—
…but she couldn’t reach.
Escallion was just too tall for her to reach his lips.
She barely brushed his chin with her lips and quickly pulled away.
I ruined it. That was even worse than doing nothing…
Belladonna looked down, too embarrassed to meet his eyes.
She sighed quietly. She felt really frustrated, but still couldn’t find the courage to speak.
In the end… I can’t do anything. So the result will always be the same.
She felt disappointment and shame wash over her all at once.
“What does that mean?”
A hard voice came from above her.
Is he angry? Belladonna quickly looked up.
But Escallion, instead of angry, was bright red, all the way to his ears.
His golden eyes looked straight at her, shaking a little.
“Can I take this to mean what I want?”
“Can I? Bella?”
He bent down, bringing his face closer.
Belladonna bit her lower lip, then nodded.
At once, his warm hand grabbed her thigh, and suddenly she was lifted high in the air.
Ah!
Belladonna, surprised, grabbed onto his shoulder.
With one hand, Escallion easily lifted her up. With the other, he pulled her close by the back of her head.
Then, their breath mixed together.
I can’t breathe…
Escallion’s kiss was always a bit rough and desperate.
He kept pushing with his lips and tongue, holding her tightly with his hand.
Belladonna lost herself, unable to resist his thick tongue moving in her mouth.
Escallion walked to the bed and gently laid her down.
She felt her back sink into the soft blanket.
“Haa…”
Escallion breathed heavily and nervously pulled off his shirt.
The wrinkled shirt fell weakly to the floor.
Belladonna, her face flushed, looked up at him as he leaned over her.
She could feel her heart beating wildly, from head to toe.
“Bella…”
He whispered softly over her and lowered his head again.
His hot breath and lips touched her neck.
Escallion gently bit her thin neck, just enough not to hurt.
It was a feeling she couldn’t stand. For the first time, Belladonna squeezed her eyes shut and covered her mouth with both hands.
Otherwise, she felt she might make strange noises without meaning to.
“Don’t do that.”
Escallion growled softly, grabbing her hands.
He stared at her with deep eyes, then gently pulled her nightgown down off her shoulders.
The soft cotton dress slipped down, revealing her round shoulders.
Escallion stared at her pale skin, then kissed her again—softly, over and over.
Smack, smack, smack.
The sweet sounds filled the room.
As the tension melted away, Belladonna’s body slowly relaxed.
She felt ticklish on her shoulders and lower belly, shrinking a little.
“You always smell so good,” Escallion mumbled against her shoulder.
“And that scent drives me crazy.”
He gently arranged her loose hair with one hand, and with the other, found her hand and laced their fingers together.
Belladonna looked into his eyes, so close to hers.
Why is he being so gentle?
His hands were soft, his eyes were hot…
It’s almost like…
Do you like me?
The question almost escaped her lips.
“Bella.”
Escallion called her name while she sat there, frozen.
Belladonna closed her mouth and looked back at him.
“If you don’t want this, tell me now. I can’t stop once we start.”
Belladonna blinked.
Did she hate it? No, she didn’t.
But…
It’s just too sudden…
Now that things had calmed down, she wondered if it had all been too rushed.
Maybe jumping at him like that wasn’t the best idea…
As she hesitated, her eyes moved to Escallion’s bare chest.
He was always warm, so he often slept without clothes.
But having him on top of her with nothing on…
Gulp.
She couldn’t take her eyes off his strong chest.
W-What do I do…
“Pff.”
Escallion noticed her stare and let out a small, breathy laugh.
Why is he laughing…?
“Do you know what your face looks like right now?”
“You look scared, but also curious.”
“You look excited, but also afraid.”
He was right.
Belladonna, embarrassed, looked away.
Escallion watched her, then sighed deeply and collapsed beside her.
Lying on his side, he looked at her and spoke, sounding very tired.
“What am I supposed to do with you?”
“Huh? Bella. How am I supposed to handle my wife?”
He poked her cheek with a finger.
“I’ve barely been around women my whole life. I don’t really know how to act with a wife, or even with any woman.”
Belladonna just stared at him.
At first, she thought he was lying or just pretending.
But now, she wanted it to be true. She hoped he really meant it.
“You are too difficult,” Escallion whispered.
“I’ve never cared or paid attention to anyone this much before.”
He pulled her into his arms, and Belladonna settled into his chest like always.
“Sorry, but I don’t think I can give you what you wanted tonight. My head is too messy.”
He softly stroked her from the back of her head down to her back.
“Maybe it’s the same for you, but having a wife is a huge deal for me too. I tried to act like it was nothing, but I can’t.”
“Did you know you keep changing my life?”
Hearing that, Belladonna looked up at him.
Changing?
She wanted to ask, but his hand was too far away to write on.
Without thinking, she touched his chest with her finger.
His chest was solid and flat—easy to write on.
W-h-a-t c-h-a-n-g-e?
She started to write, but Escallion suddenly moved back and grabbed her hand.
“Are you doing this on purpose?”
His face went red again, shocked.
Huh? What…?
Belladonna looked at him, not understanding.
He covered his eyes and groaned.
“I let it go and you don’t even realize what you’re doing…”
Belladonna awkwardly pulled her hand away.
Escallion lay on his back, looking at the ceiling, taking deep breaths.
“Bella.”
Hearing him say her name made her feel good.
“If I give you my side, will you give me yours?”
Belladonna didn’t answer, so he turned to face her.
Resting his head on his arm, he asked in a calm, low voice,
“Will you ever tell me your story?”
Belladonna looked at him, confused.
My story…?
Did he mean just talking, or did he really think she could speak? She couldn’t tell.
Escallion reached out and brushed her hair back.
He pulled a handful toward him and pressed it to his lips.
He held it there for a moment, then smiled.
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
The next day, Belladonna woke up when the sun was already high.
She quickly looked beside her.
Gone…
Escallion had left early, leaving only the cold empty space beside her.
“Phew…”
In the end, nothing happened.
After that short talk, Escallion had just held her as usual and gone to sleep.
Maybe it was for the best…
Thinking of Escallion’s serious eyes and heavy breathing last night, Belladonna felt hot all over again.
“Ahh…!”
She cried out softly and kicked off her blanket.
I don’t know! It’s too dangerous being with him! I almost really had my wedding night with him…!
She rolled around and then stopped.
Did I really want to spend the night with him?
She just didn’t want to go back to Astanya in two months.
She hated the Pope’s plan.
As for the wedding night with Escallion…
Belladonna turned and buried her face in her pillow.
“Ugh, I don’t know… I just want to go to Sirlennia soon…”
She didn’t want to go back to Astanya or stay with Escallion and her strange feelings for him. She wanted to be somewhere else entirely.
Knock knock.
Just then, someone knocked on the door.
