Chapter 35
That Side of You Annoys Me!
2024.04.04.
âUhâŚâ
My throat felt like it was caught on something. A dozen thoughts rushed through my mind in that instant.
There was only one person in this entire world who knew that I couldnât use magic â Grisha.
Grishaâs like family. Someone I can trust, someone I can rely on.
But strangely, I suddenly wanted to be honest with Cedar too.
The time Iâd spent with Cedar was nothing compared to how long Iâd known Grisha, and yetâ
If I tell him the truth, heâll just pity me. Heâll try to protect me.
The Cedar Granite I knew was the furthest thing from a cold man.
But this is my problem.
Was it right to burden him with it? To make it his responsibility when even staying by his side was dangerous for me?
There were too many tangled thoughts to find a clear answer.
In the end, I lowered my head and said quietly,
ââŚI canât tell you.â
At that, Cedarâs expression twisted sharply.
Iâd thought he would just sigh and back off after hearing that. Instead, he stepped closer to me, and I blinked in surprise.
There wasnât even a trace of the earthy scent Iâd smelled on him last night.
Instead, the air around me filled with that familiar sharp scent that always clung to himâone that somehow calmed me every time.
But I didnât have the luxury of being soothed. Cedarâs voice was low and cutting.
âSo youâre keeping secrets from me? I saved you last night. You were shaking in fearâyou couldnât even use magic.â
My face stiffened. I answered coolly, pointing out the obvious.
âYouâre also the one who put me in danger.â
âWhat?â
âThe assassinâyou think your mother sent them, right? Or am I wrong?â
ââŚâ
I was grateful heâd saved me, sure, but if I hadnât met him, I wouldnât have been in danger to begin with.
Of course, itâs not as if he couldâve predicted all that. And if I hadnât entered this contract marriage, I might have been killed by Diana alreadyâŚ
Still, wrong is wrong.
He had no right to demand that I tell him my secrets like that.
Cedarâs eyes trembled slightly. Then, with the look of a lost child, he dropped his gaze and muttered, his voice subdued.
ââŚYouâre right. I should be the one apologizing. Iâm really sorry.â
I hadnât said it to make him feel guilty, but seeing him so earnestly remorseful made my heart soften anyway.
I shrugged lightly and smiled.
âItâs okay. I didnât say that to get an apology. You did save me, after all. You have no idea how relieved I was when I heard your voice yesterday.â
That was something I would never forget for the rest of my life, even if we divorced one day.
It was the first time Iâd cried so much. The first time Iâd clung to someone with everything I had.
I meant it when I said softly,
âYou were really cool. Thank you.â
At my honest words, Cedarâs lips thinned. Looking slightly embarrassed, he hesitated before finally speaking again.
âWhen you say youâre keeping a secret from me, itâs justâŚ.â
Just what?
I perked my ears, trying to listen sincerelyâbut in the end, Cedar didnât finish his sentence.
Running a rough hand through his hair, he sat back down with a heavy sigh and said stiffly,
âForget it. Pretend you didnât hear that. I just got mad and said something stupid. I admit it wasnât rational.â
âYou sure know how to reflect fast.â
Itâd be nice if heâd not only reflect but also tell me what he meant by that.
Cedar crossed his arms and pouted, looking oddly troubled.
Well, itâs understandable. His mother did send assassins to the house.
I remembered the despair Iâd felt when I first realized Diana wanted me dead.
When family betrays you, the wound cuts much deeper than any stranger could.
It must be even harder for him since itâs his mother.
I wanted to comfort him somehow, but what came out of my mouth was a half-joking, half-awkward remark.
âWhatever happened, you should try to make up with your mother.â
âMake up? Are you kidding me?â
Right. Sending assassins wasnât the kind of thing you did after a simple argument. It was a bad joke.
Why do I have such terrible social skills?
Maybe I should take it back.
As I hesitated, Cedar tilted his head and gave me a crooked grin. His tone turned teasing.
âOr are you saying youâll give her what she wants? Maybe have my child?â
He said it with the wounded tone of a sulky child, but the man speaking wasnât a childâhe was a tall, broad-shouldered, handsome man looking at me with sad eyes.
It made the whole thing sound so weird.
Good thing itâs me sitting here. Anyone else would totally misunderstand.
I pressed my finger to the furrow forming between his brows.
âDonât say things you donât mean. You always say nasty things when youâre upsetâand end up hurting yourself too.â
ââŚâ
But instead of getting defensive, Cedar just looked stunned.
Iâd expected him to argue, but he just stared at me, dazed, as if something had hit him.
Whatâs with him?
Moments like this reminded me how little I truly knew him.
Rather than push further, I returned to the main issue.
âAnyway, I married you for survival. But if that very marriage puts my life in danger, then I have to reconsider everything. Thatâs why Iâd rather not answer your question.â
Whatever I said shouldnât influence his decisionsâand vice versa.
But maybe because of his mother, Cedarâs mood was unusually volatile today.
He frowned and asked sharply,
âSo whatâyou donât trust me as your contract partner?â
Why did he have to twist my words like that? I pressed my fingers against my temples, feeling a headache coming on.
âI just need some time to think. Donât you?â
âThink about what?â
Did he really not get it? He also had every reason to reconsider this contract.
I explained patiently,
âSince your mother has decided she doesnât like me, Iâve become a risk, not an advantage. A liability to protect, not a partner that benefits you.â
After all, it wasnât good for either of us if assassins kept coming.
His brows knitted tighter.
âA risk? What do you mean?â
Waitâhad assassins come before last night too? That couldnât be⌠right?
Or does he mean heâs strong enough that it doesnât matter if they come?
There were only two possibilities: either Cedar was so powerful that assassins were no threat to him, orâ
He just wouldnât bother saving me next time.
Even though he had saved me last night, technically, he didnât have to.
Realizing that, I clapped my hands and said brightly,
âOh, right! Now that I think about it, itâs not really a loss for you if I get assassinated! You could just say youâre mourning your wife and delay remarrying!â
In other words, I was the only one taking the risk here.
So thereâs no reason for him to think it over. Iâm the one who has to decide.
And honestly, the decision wasnât that hard.
If Iâd gotten married to avoid dying, but now that marriage might kill me instead, then of course I should get divorced.
So why does it feel so wrong�
As I frowned and sighed, trying to figure out my own emotions, Cedar suddenly erupted.
âNellie Periway!â
I flinched at the sound of my full name shouted like that.
He stood up, exhaling deeply as if restraining himself, then pointed a finger right at me.
âYou know what? Maybe youâre right about everythingâbut your tone is so damn irritating!â
âWhat?â
Was he⌠picking a fight?
I thought only academy professors did that. Cedar Granite, of all people?
I guess people really do have hidden sides. Maybe Iâd been too bluntâbut was tone really the issue right now?
I tilted my head.
âSo? What, you want to skip the thinking part and just get divorced right now?â
âUgh!â
Cedarâs face turned red. His shoulders shook as if he might explode, then he clenched his fists and shouted,
âThatâs exactly what I mean! That tone! Itâs so annoying! When did I say I wanted a divorce? How much time do you even need to think?!â
âThree days?â
âFine! Whatever!â
Even in the middle of yelling, he still answered me.
Then, stomping loudly, Cedar turned and stormed out of my room.
I just sat there, blinking, completely lost.
Whyâs he so angry?
I hadnât said anything insulting. Didnât attack his character.
Heâs more sensitive than I thought.
I mentally jotted down a new note: âCedar Granite â sensitive.â
Just thenâ
âAnd another thing!â
âHiccup!â
As if heâd read my mind, Cedar suddenly threw the door open again and stuck his head back in.
Startled, I hiccupped on the spot.

